The Betrothal

A Christmas Doctrinal Class by Rev. Andrew M.T. Dibb

Now in the sixth month the angel Gabriel was sent by God to a city of Galilee named Nazareth, to a virgin betrothed to a man whose name was Joseph, of the house of David. The virgin's name was Mary. (Luke 1:26-27)

So begins the wonderful story of the Lord's conception in the Gospel of Luke. The scene is familiar to each of us: Mary is at home, when suddenly she sees the angel Gabriel and hears his words of great joy:

"Rejoice, highly favoured one, the Lord is with you; blessed are you among women!" (Luke 1:28)

An angel is a messenger of the Lord. In the Word angels came to bring wisdom and comfort, hope and the good news, the “euangellion” or Gospel, to those to whom the Lord wanted His presence revealed. This Gospel is the teaching that the Lord Jesus Christ was born into this world, that He made it possible for all people to be saved and brought into His kingdom. Thus the angel Gabriel came in excitement to Mary to inform her that she was the Lord’s choice as His natural mother.

When Mary saw the angel Gabriel, she didn't know that he was the human form of an entire society of angels. Nor did she know that his greatest love is to tell people about the Lord, especially that He would be born into the world to save the human race from spiritual bondage.

The scene of the angel Gabriel announcing to Mary that she would conceive and bear a son, and call His name Jesus, is one of the most poignant in the Word. Mary was a simple person, living in Galilee far away from the centre of worship at Jerusalem. She was neither highly educated nor socially well connected, except that she descended from Israel’s greatest king, David. There is a beautiful innocence in Mary’s simplicity. The last thing she expected in life was to see an angel. The image we have of Mary is of a demure young maiden, a virgin in every sense, for, as she said to the angel, 'I do not know a man'. Her state of life was that of a young woman about to embark on her married life to Joseph, but still living at home with her parents. The marriage had not yet been celebrated.

It is central to the Christmas story that Mary was betrothed to Joseph when the angel Gabriel appeared to her. This fact is mentioned in the lesson we read in the Gospel of Luke, where it is plainly stated that she was a 'virgin betrothed'. In Matthew we are again told that Mary was 'betrothed to Joseph'. This means that she had been promised as a wife to Joseph. In our culture, we would say that they were engaged to be married.

There are several good reasons why Mary should have been in this state when she conceived the Lord:

- In the Jewish Church of that time betrothal was considered marriage, although the marriage had not yet been consummated. This meant that the people around her considered Mary a woman, and it also meant that her mind was focusing on the upcoming marriage and future life as a wife and a mother.

- She was expected, during this period of betrothal, to remain in a state of order. She was not free to come into romantic contact with any other man, and she certainly was not permitted to have sexual intercourse with any man, including her husband to be.

The angel appeared to her in this state precisely for that reason - the child who was to be conceived needed to be conceived in a state of virginity, and there could be no question down the ages that Jesus was the son of an ordinary man. This is why Mary protested that she could not conceive because she 'had not known a man'.

There is a very good reason for this: the doctrines tell us that the human soul is transmitted as the living principle of the masculine seed. That soul, or internal human is passed from father to child, is an image of the father's own soul - although the life in it is from the Divine Itself. When a child is conceived, that human soul can receive life from the Lord, and, using the life in it, begins to draw from the mother the various substances needed to form the human body. When the child is born, he or she becomes an individual, drawing life from the Lord, and potential spiritual things from both mother and father, and the body from the mother. Thus there is a complete mixing of parents in the birth of a child.

When the angel Gabriel came to Mary, he announced the birth of the Lord. It was to be a miracle of all miracles, for according to prophecy a virgin would conceive and bear a son. He was conceived of the Holy Spirit. His soul was Divine, given to Him by the Father, or, put another way, the soul within Jesus was not limited and finite as our souls are, but infinite and eternal, and capable of overcoming the powers of hell and saving the human race.

Here's an excerpt from Swedenborg's work, Arcana Coelestia 1999: "But the Lord's Internal was Jehovah Himself, since He was conceived from Jehovah, who cannot be divided or become the relative of another, like a son who has been conceived from a human father. For unlike the human, the Divine is not capable of being divided but is and remains one and the same. To this Internal the Lord united the Human Essence. Moreover because the Lord's Internal was Jehovah it was not, like man's internal, a recipient form of life, but life itself. Through that union His Human Essence as well became life itself. Hence the Lord's frequent declaration that He is Life, as in John,

As the Father has Life in Himself, so He has granted the Son to have Life in Himself. John 5:26."

Yet even a soul such as that, if it is to live and walk amongst the people of this earth, must be clothed in a body. The Lord always operates within the boundaries of the order of creation - and order dictates that a soul must be clothed with a material body.

At first the father’s soul is clothed with human elements, for it begins as a reproduction of the father’s own soul, then,

"during its descent, … the soul is enveloped by elements of a type that have to do with the father's natural love. This is the source from which hereditary evil springs." (Conjugial Love 245)

And so the Lord needed an orderly environment in which to be born. Mary was chosen as His mother because, according to the Lord's all-seeing wisdom, He saw that she would be willing to carry this child, and she would be able to nurture Him in such a way that He would grow up prepared for the great work ahead of Him.

Yet Mary had to be in a state of order herself. In ancient Israel, to bear a child meant that she had to be married, and yet to preserve the honesty of the conception and ensure that the soul was Divine, not human, she had to be in the state before actual physical union with Joseph had taken place - otherwise the Lord could have been Joseph's son. So she had to be betrothed, and no motive should be found as a basis for accusations against the Virgin Birth.

It was partly for this reason that when Joseph heard that she was carrying a child he decided to put her away. Effectively this meant he planned to divorce her. According to the law of Moses, a betrothed woman carrying a child had broken the rules. Ideally speaking, the man responsible should be put to death. Joseph had no idea who the man was, but assumed that there was one. He was, however, a kind man, and so decided not 'to make her a public example', but to put her away privately.

It was at this juncture that the angel Gabriel came to Joseph in a dream, and soothed his fears. 'The child she is carrying,' the angel said, 'is conceived by the Holy Spirit.' Now Joseph understood, and the state of betrothal could continue, and order could be maintained so that the Lord could be born into this world with the full appearance of two loving parents, bound together in marriage after an orderly betrothal.

We now need to expand our vision of the Lord's life in this world. The conception of the Lord was but the first step in his development. He had to be born and grow up. His mind and body had to develop as does our own. The home of Mary and Joseph was needed to provide a stable and orderly environment for Him where He could live and grow, undergoing not only physical and mental development, but also the very processes by which His Divine soul could become present within His natural mind.

In picking these two people to be his 'parents' in the natural world, the Lord was able to provide for the future as well. The Word does not tell us anything about the marriage relationship between Joseph and Mary. We know that Joseph was obedient to the angel when he was told to take Mary and the infant Lord down to Egypt to escape Herod's cruelty. We know that each year they travelled to Jerusalem to celebrate the Passover. We know that had other children, whom likewise they loved and nurtured. But that is about all we know.

The book, Conjugial Love, by Emanuel Swedenborg, however, gives us some insights into the kind of orderly relationship they had. They begin in the concept of Betrothal, for betrothal is introductory to marriage. The kinds of preparation people make for their marriages determine a great deal the course their marriage will follow. The fact that Mary in her betrothed state had 'not known a man' indicates that she took the responsibilities of that state serious. Similarly, the fact that Joseph immediately knew that he was not the father of the child Mary carried indicates a similar seriousness about the state of betrothal. They were both innocent of any wrongdoing, and were obviously committed to building a life together based on the firm foundation of proper preparation.

Their betrothal prepared them for their future life together as man and wife, and, thus as the Lord's parents on earth. Betrothal is a preparation for marriage. It is a time when the minds and spirits of the two partners begin to grow together.

The teachings of the New Church tell us that true marriage, or conjugial love as it is often called, is a meeting and union of two minds. A true marriage is one in which the couple recognises the essential differences between masculinity and femininity, and rejoices in those differences without any attempt to dominate the other. In order for a couple to come into a true appreciation of each other, they need to put aside physical love to foster and nurture spiritual love. This is why Mary and Joseph lived apart during this stage of their relationship, and why they refrained from sexual activity, for in that way they made it possible for their minds to soar, and be united at the highest levels of idealism.

The book Conjugial Love tells us that in this state the mind of each partner is opened by his or her spiritual love. They are able to reach higher levels of love and commitment to each other as they foster the growth of mutual understanding unencumbered by physical things. The passage describing this development, then, goes on to describe how when a couple marry their love descends from the mind to the body. It is worth reflecting on the statement that

"It needs to be known that the quality of conjugial love as it comes down is determined by the height to which it climbs. If it reaches the heights it comes down chaste, but if it does not, it comes down as unchaste." (Conjugial Love 302).

With Mary and Joseph we can but only assume that their love reached its heights during their betrothal, and that their marriage was one of purity and chastity. Chastity in this sense means a marriage love between two people that has been cleansed of all impurities. In such a state the husband and wife enjoy the full pleasures of marriage, beginning on the spiritual level with a full meeting of minds, and descends into the body, where their love is consummated.

A marriage of this kind provides the most wonderful environment, for the love between the husband and wife provides a state of tranquillity and peace in which children can be reared. This is the kind of environment the Lord chose to be born into. He knew that during his life in this world He would have to face the most terrible of temptations. He knew that He would have to battle against hell continuously, and face the disbelief of the people around Him. His first thirty-three years were a preparation for this work lying before Him. And so He chose to be born to a couple who were in a state of order, who because of that order, were willing to receive Him into their lives, to nurture Him as if He was their own.

There is a message in this for us. Each one of us wants the Lord to be born into our own lives, and He is willing to come to us. "Behold,' He says, 'I stand at the door and knock'. Yet He can only enter into us to the degree that we bring our lives into order. Mary and Joseph clung to their betrothal - they committed themselves and stood fast. That is what the Lord wants us to do: to commit ourselves to Him, to live according to His Word in every detail of our lives, especially in our relationships with others, in our preparation for marriage, and in our marriages themselves. As we do, then He enters into us, establishes His presence there, and lifts us up to heaven.

AMEN

Lessons:

Deuteronomy 22:25-29

Isaiah 7:14-16

Luke 1:26-38

Conjugial Love 302

3881. 'Therefore she called his name Judah' means the essential nature of it. This is clear from the meaning of 'name' and of 'calling the name' as the essential nature, dealt with in 144, 145, 1754, 1896, 2009, 2724, 3006, 3421. That nature is contained in the internal sense of these words spoken by Leah - 'This time I will confess Jehovah', dealt with immediately above in 3880. That is to say, in the highest sense those words mean the Lord and the Divinity of His Love, in the internal sense the Word and also the Lord's celestial kingdom, and in the more exterior sense doctrine from the Word which the celestial Church has. But as yet scarcely anyone knows that these things are meant in the Word when the name Judah is mentioned, the reason being that the historical descriptions of the Word are thought to be simply historical descriptions, and the prophetical utterances to belong among such things as have fallen into oblivion, except for some of them from which doctrinal inferences may be drawn out. No belief exists that those descriptions and utterances have a spiritual sense within them, because at the present day no knowledge exists of what the spiritual sense is, or indeed of what the spiritual is. And the chief reason for this is that the life which people lead is the natural life. This is such that when they have that life as their end in view or it is the only life they desire, it blots out both spiritual knowledge and faith - so much so that when spiritual life and a spiritual sense are spoken of, these are like something that does not really exist or else are something unpleasant and depressing which, because it does not accord with natural life, they find distasteful. Such being the condition of the human race at the present day it neither understands nor wishes to understand by the names mentioned in the Word anything else than the nations, peoples, individual persons, regions, cities, mountains, or rivers, which those names denote. Yet in the spiritual sense names mean real things.

[2] That 'Judah' in the internal sense means the Lord's celestial Church, in the universal sense His celestial kingdom, and in the highest sense the Lord Himself may be seen from many places in the Old Testament where Judah is mentioned, for example, from the following: In Moses,

You are Judah; your brothers will praise you; your hand will be on the neck of your enemies; the sons of your father will bow down to you. A lion's whelp is Judah; from the prey you have gone up, my son. He crouched, he lay down like a lion, and like an old lion; who will rouse him up? The sceptre will not depart from Judah, nor a lawgiver from between his feet until Shiloh comes; and to him will be the gathering of peoples. Binding his ass's colt to the vine, and the foal of his she-ass to a choice vine, he will wash his clothing in wine, and his garment in the blood of grapes. His eyes are red from wine, and his teeth white from milk. Genesis 49:8-12.

[3] Nobody can know the meaning of this prophetical declaration about Judah uttered by Jacob, who by then was Israel - not even one expression used there - except from the internal sense. He cannot know for example what is meant by 'his brothers will praise him' and 'his father's sons will bow down to him', or by 'his going up from the prey like a lion's whelp', and 'his crouching and lying down like a lion'. Nor can he know what is meant by 'Shiloh', by 'binding his ass's colt to the vine, and the foal of his she-ass to a choice vine', by 'washing his clothing in wine, and his garment in the blood of grapes', by 'eyes red from wine', or by 'teeth white from milk'. As has been stated, these expressions cannot possibly be understood by anyone except from the internal sense, yet all of them - each one - mean celestial things belonging to the Lord's kingdom, also things that are Divine. The same words also foretell that the Lord's celestial kingdom, and in the highest sense the Lord Himself, were to be represented by Judah. All these things declared by Jacob will in the Lord's Divine mercy be discussed in the explanations of the chapter in which they occur.

[4] Similar examples involving the name Judah occur elsewhere, especially in the Prophets, as in Ezekiel,

You son of man, take a stick and write on it, For Judah and for the children of Israel, his companions'. And take another stick and write on it, For Joseph - the stick of Ephraim and of the whole house of Israel, his companions - and join them together, one to the other into one stick for you, and they will be one in your, hand. I will make them into one nation in the land, on the mountains of Israel, and one king will be king to them all. My servant David will be king over them, and they will all have one shepherd. And they will walk in My judgements, and keep My statutes and do them. And they will dwell in the land which I gave to Jacob My servant, in which your fathers dwelt. And they will dwell in it, they and their sons, and their sons' sons even for ever. And David My servant will be their prince for ever, and I will make with them a covenant of peace, it will be an eternal covenant with them. I will bless them, and multiply them, and I will grant My sanctuary in their midst for evermore. Thus will My dwelling-place be with them, and I will be their God, and they will be My people. Ezekiel 37:15-28.

Anyone who takes Judah, Israel, Joseph, Ephraim, and David in this passage to mean those actual people will believe all these things will actually take place as described in the sense of the letter. That is to say, he will believe that Israel is going to be reunited with Judah, as well as the tribe of Ephraim; also that David is going to reign as king; that in this manner they are going to dwell in the land given to Jacob for ever, and that at that time an eternal covenant will exist with them and the sanctuary will be in the midst of them for ever. But in fact the meaning of this passage has nothing whatever to do with that nation but with the Lord's celestial kingdom meant by 'Judah', and His spiritual kingdom meant by 'Israel', and with the Lord Himself meant by 'David'. From this it is quite evident that names are not used to mean actual persons but things that are celestial and Divine.

[5] The same is so with the following words in Zechariah,

Many peoples and numerous nations will come to seek Jehovah Zebaoth in Jerusalem and to placate Jehovah's face. Thus said Jehovah Zebaoth, In those days ten men from the nations of every tongue will take hold; and they will take hold of the hem of a man of Judah, saying, We will go with you, for we have heard that God is with you. Zechariah 8:22-23.

Those who take these words literally will say, as the Jewish nation believes still, that being a prophecy not yet fulfilled it is going to be fulfilled in the future. These say that they are going to go back to the land of Canaan, that many from every nation and tongue will follow them, and take hold of the hem of a man of Judah and plead to be allowed to follow. They say that at that time God - that is to say, the Messiah, whom Christians call the Lord - will be among them, to whom they must first be converted. This would be the true implication of these words if 'a man of Judah' were used to mean a man of Judah. But in fact the internal sense at this point deals with a new spiritual Church among gentiles, and 'a man of Judah' means saving faith which results from love to the Lord.

[6] That 'Judah' is not used to mean Judah but, as has been stated, means in the internal sense the Lord's celestial kingdom which was represented in the Church established among Judah or the Jews, becomes quite clear from the following places: In Isaiah,

When the Lord raises an ensign for the nations He will gather the outcasts of Israel, and will assemble the dispersed of Judah from the four corners of the earth. Then the envy of Ephraim will depart, and the enemies of Judah will be cut off. Ephraim will not envy Judah, and Judah will not harass Ephraim. Isaiah 11:12-13.

In Jeremiah,

Behold, the days are coming, said Jehovah, when I will raise up for David a righteous branch, who will reign as king, and prosper, and execute judgement and righteousness in the land. In His days Judah will be saved, and Israel will dwell securely. And this is His name which they will call Him, Jehovah our Righteousness. Jeremiah 23:5-6.

In Joel,

Then you will know that I am Jehovah your God, who dwell in Zion, My holy mountain; and Jerusalem will be holy. It will happen on that day, that the mountains will drip new wine, and the hills will flow with milk, and all the streams of Judah will flow with water; and a spring will come forth from the house of Jehovah and will water the river of Shittim. Judah will abide for ever, and Jerusalem from generation to generation. Joel 3:17-18, 20.

[7] In Zechariah,

On that day I will strike every horse with panic, and its rider with madness. And on the house of Judah I will open My eyes, and every horse of the peoples I will strike with blindness. And the leaders of Judah will say in their hearts, I will strengthen for myself the inhabitants of Jerusalem in Jehovah Zebaoth their God. On that day I will set the leaders of Judah like a hearth of fire in sticks of wood, and like a torch of fire in a sheaf; and they will devour to the right and to the left all the peoples round about, and Jerusalem will yet again be inhabited in her own place, in Jerusalem. And Jehovah will save the tents of Judah first, that the glory of the house of David, and the glory of the inhabitant of Jerusalem, may not exalt itself over Judah. On that day Jehovah will protect the inhabitant of Jerusalem, and the house of David will be like God, like the angel of Jehovah in front of them. And I will pour out over the house of David and over the inhabitant of Jerusalem a spirit of grace. Zechariah 12:4-10.

This refers to the Lord's celestial kingdom, where truth should not have dominion over good but ought to be subordinate to it, truth being meant by 'the house of David' and 'the inhabitant of Jerusalem', and good by 'Judah'. From this it is evident why first it is said that 'the glory of the house of David, and the glory of the inhabitant of Jerusalem, will not exalt itself over Judah', and after this that 'the house of David will be like God, and like the angel of Jehovah', and that 'a spirit of grace will be poured out over it and over the inhabitant of Jerusalem'. For such is the state when truth is subordinate to good or faith to love. 'The horse which will be struck with panic, and the horse of the peoples with blindness' is self-intelligence, see 2761, 2762, 3217.

[8] In the same prophet,

On that day there will be on the horses' bells, Holiness to Jehovah. And the pots in the house of Jehovah will be as the bowls before the altar. And every pot in Jerusalem and in Judah will be holiness to Jehovah Zebaoth. Zechariah 14:20-21.

This refers to the Lord's kingdom. In Malachi,

Behold, I am sending My angel, who will prepare the way before Me, and suddenly there will come to His temple the Lord whom you are seeking, and the angel of the covenant in whom you delight. Behold, He is coming. Who can endure the day of His coming? Then the minchah of Judah and Jerusalem will be acceptable to Jehovah, as in the days of old and as in former years. Malachi 3:1-2, 4.

This plainly refers to the Coming of the Lord. The meaning is that Judah and Jerusalem's minchah was not, as is well known, acceptable but that worship flowing from love, Judah's minchah, and worship flowing from faith rooted in love, Jerusalem's minchah, are acceptable.

[9] In Jeremiah,

Thus said Jehovah Zebaoth, Again they will speak this word in the land of Judah and in its cities when I turn again their captivity: Jehovah bless you, O habitation of righteousness, O holy mountain! And Judah and all its cities will dwell in it together. Behold, the days are coming, said Jehovah, in which I will sow the house of Judah with the seed of man and the seed of beast. Behold, the days are coming, said Jehovah, in which I will make with the house of Israel and with the house of Judah a new covenant, not like the covenant which I made with their fathers. Jeremiah 31:23-24, 27, 31-32.

In David,

The Lord chose the tribe of Judah, Mount Zion, which He loved, and built His sanctuary as the heights, as the earth He founded it for ever. Psalms 78:68-69.

[10] From these places and very many others which have not been mentioned one may see what 'Judah' means in the Word. They show that 'Judah' does not mean the Jewish nation, for that nation was anything but the celestial Church or the Lord's celestial kingdom; for so far as love to the Lord, charity towards the neighbour, and faith; went they were the worst nation of all. This has been so from their earliest forefathers, namely the sons of Jacob, even to the present day. But in spite of this such people were able to represent the celestial and spiritual things of the Lord's kingdom, see 3479-3481. For in representations no attention is paid to the person who represents, only to what is represented by him, 665, 1097 (end), 1361, 3147, 3670.

[11] But when they did not adhere to the religious observances commanded by Jehovah or the Lord but deviated from them into acts of idolatry they no longer represented those things but such as are contrary to them, namely those of hell and the devil, according to the Lord's words in John,

You are from your father the devil, and the desires of your father you will to do. He was a murderer from the beginning, and did not take a stand on the truth. John 8:44

Such is the meaning of 'Judah' in the contrary sense, as becomes clear from the following: In Isaiah,

Jerusalem has stumbled, and Judah has fallen, because their tongue and their works are against Jehovah, to provoke the eyes of His glory to anger. Isaiah 3:8.

In Malachi,

Judah has acted faithlessly, and abomination has been committed in Israel and in Jerusalem, and Judah has profaned the holiness of Jehovah, for he loved and married the daughter of a foreign god. Malachi 2:11.

And in addition in the following places - Isaiah 3:1 and following verses;

8:7-8; Jeremiah 2:28; 3:7-11; 9:26; 11:9-10, 12; 13:9; 14:2; 17:1; 18:11-13; 19:7; 32:35; 36:31; 44:12, 14, 26, 28; Hosea 5:5; 8:14; Amos 2:4-5; Zephaniah 1:4; and many times elsewhere.