Chapter 19.

Teachings About Marriage

1. And it came to pass, when Jesus had finished these words, He departed from Galilee, and came into the borders of Judea, across the Jordan.

2. And many crowds followed Him; and He cured them there.

3. And the Pharisees came to Him, tempting Him, and saying to Him, “Is it permitted for a man to send away his wife for every cause?”

4. And He answering said to them, “Have you not read that He who made [them] from the beginning made them male and female,

5. And said, ‘On this account shall a man leave father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife; and the two shall become one flesh?’

6. So they are no longer two, but one flesh. What, therefore, God has joined together, let not man put asunder.”

7. They say unto Him, “Why then did Moses command to give a document of divorce, and to send her away?”

8. He says to them, “Moses, because of your hard-heartedness, permitted you to send away your wives; but from the beginning it was not so.

9. And I say unto you that whoever shall send away his wife, except over scortation, and shall marry another, commits adultery; and he who marries her that is sent away commits adultery.”

The decline of marriage

Jesus has just finished speaking about what it means to be “great” in the kingdom of heaven. He illustrated this by placing a child in the midst of His disciples, urging them to become as little children. He then added that they should “humble themselves” as a little child — the very opposite of any attempt to exalt themselves.

In their early years, little children store up precious memories of how it feels to love and be loved, to forgive and be forgiven. Their tender hearts are open to the gentle and direct influences of heaven. As Jesus said at the beginning of the previous chapter, “their angels continually look at the face of My Father in heaven” (18:10).

The gentleness of children is then contrasted with the hard-heartedness of the unforgiving servant — a man who was unwilling to forgive a minor debt even though he himself had been forgiven an enormous debt. Between the two episodes (setting a child in the midst of the disciples and the story of the unforgiving servant), Peter asks Jesus, “How often should I forgive someone who sins against me. Up to seven times?” “No,” says Jesus, “seventy times seven,” which means always and forever (see 18:21-22).

With these important teachings about forgiveness in mind, the gospel narrative now turns to the subject of marriage. Although marriage was God’s first blessing (Genesis 1:28), over the course of time it came to be seen as merely a convenience for men who wanted women to serve them as their domestic slaves, preparing meals and producing children. No longer seen as a sacred blessing from God, marriage had lost its grandeur and beauty; the beautiful ideal of two souls becoming as one was lost. Husbands no longer regarded their wives as their noble companions, but rather as their domestic servants. ¹

Hardness of heart

This brief history of marriage and its decline provides an important context for the next episode. As Jesus comes into the land of Judea, He is approached by the religious leaders who ask, “Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for just any reason?” (19:3). Their question regards the proper interpretation of a well-known law: “When a man takes a wife and marries her, and it happens that she find no favor in his eyes because he has found some uncleanness in her, let him write her a certificate of divorce, put it in her hand, and send her out of his house” (Deuteronomy 24:1). This law seems to sanction divorce for any cause. However, not all of the religious leaders agreed. In fact, there was a dispute between two rabbinical schools of thought. One of the schools (Hillel) was teaching that it is literally true that a wife could be divorced for any cause; but an opposing school (Shammai) was teaching that a woman could be divorced only for adultery. ²

This was obviously a trick question, designed to trap Jesus into taking one of the sides in the debate. Because it was a “hot button” issue at the time, Jesus answer was sure to offend someone. Rather than get trapped in this literalistic debate, Jesus uses this opportunity to teach a higher lesson. “Have you not read,” He says, “that He who made them at the beginning ‘made them male and female’ and said ‘for this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’? So then they are no longer two but one flesh. Therefore, what God has joined together, let not man put asunder” (19:6). Not content with this answer, the Pharisees press on, saying, “Why then did Moses command to give a certificate of divorce and put her away?” (19:7). Jesus’ response is simple and straightforward: “Moses, because of the hardness of your hearts, permitted you to divorce your wives, but from the beginning it was not so” (19:8).

Jesus here refers to the “hardness of heart” that had set in over the years. Jesus is very careful about His choice of words. He says that Moses permitted it. This is to make it clear that this command came from Moses, as a permission, but that it is not the Lord’s will. ³

Many of the laws in the Hebrew scriptures were given in their literal form in accommodation to the states of the people, for it was all that they could understand at the time. But just because a law is written in the scriptures, the literal words of that law does not necessarily reflect the Lord’s will for all people at all times. Laws that permitted men to take many wives, or to divorce their wives whenever they wished, were permissions granted on account of the hardness of their hearts, less they perpetrate even more grievous evils. ⁴

We know for example that the famous law regarding revenge, “An eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth” (Leviticus 24:20), was given so that human beings, in their cruelty, would not retaliate beyond the offense that was given. Similarly, the many laws about animal sacrifice were given, not because God delights in the slaughter of animals, but because it was better than the sacrifice of children. ⁵

All of these permissions were granted because of the hardness of people’s hearts — that state of inordinate pride, self-love and arrogant self-confidence which is the very opposite of humility. In this state of mind people become unyielding and rigid, unwilling and therefore unable to see anything beyond their own world view. As a result there is no understanding of others, no forgiveness and no mercy. In the Word, it is called a “heart of stone.” (Ezekiel 36:26). ⁶

One indication of “hardness of heart” is a propensity to focus on our own understanding of truth, to the exclusion of love. Whenever we do this, we have a tendency to become stern, austere, harsh and unyielding. But when truth and love are united in us, and in our lives, we become gentle, soft-hearted, and compassionate. A mere understanding of truth does not become wisdom until it is filled with — or “married to” — goodness. This can be compared to the influence that a woman can have upon her husband as they become more and more one soul in the marital relationship. The wife can help her husband transform his innate hard-headed, hard-hearted intelligence into the true wisdom of a husband. ⁷

The marriage relationship, then, can be a transformative experience. It can transform a heart of stone into a heart of flesh. This is also true for every human being — whether married or not. This is because the marriage relationship between one man and one woman represents the deeper spiritual relationship between truth and goodness that takes place in every human soul. To the extent that the truth we know is united with goodness, we become more and more a human being — more and more an image of God. As it is written, “Male and female He created them. In the image of God He created them” (Genesis 1:27).

Truth must be united with goodness. If we were to “put away our wife” (goodness) for any reason — that is, divorce ourselves from, love, mercy, and forgiveness — our hearts would remain hard, proud, unyielding, and full of self-love. On the other hand, as we become “one flesh” with these tender qualities, our hearts are softened; we become yielding and receptive to what flows in from the divine.

What God has joined together

In the previous chapter, Jesus instructed His disciples about the importance of humility by setting a child in their midst. And in the story of the unforgiving servant we saw the vital link between humility (awareness of our debt to the Lord) and forgiveness. Now, in this next chapter, the teaching continues in an area of human life where humility and forgiveness are of utmost practical importance — marriage.

Humility is directly related to the ability to see our own evils, to acknowledge them, and to pray for the power to overcome them. Without this essential virtue, a marriage relationship will eventually deteriorate into contempt and criticism, whether spoken outwardly or harbored silently in a hardened-heart. Moreover, without the spirit of humility, each strives for mastery over the other, seeking to have the upper hand, insisting on having the last word. Whether openly through physical coercion and verbal abuse, or secretly through various forms of manipulation, each will strive to dominate the other. The relentless desire to exert control inevitably leads to heated arguments and bitter strife, or to stubborn resistance and icey silence. Either way, what God intends to be our heaven on earth becomes a living hell at home. ⁸

But this need not be the case. As Jesus says, “From the beginning it was not so.” The beginning of a marriage, like the infancy of our lives, is a time of tender, spontaneous love. Hearts are soft and forgiving. But over the course of time, especially as selfishness sets in, hearts can begin to harden and grow cold; two people who once promised to love each other forever now begin to think about separation and divorce.

How, then, do we overcome “hardness of heart”? Or to say it differently, how can we transform a contemptuous, haughty attitude into an attitude that is humble, respectful and open to the viewpoints of others? As Jesus has shown, there is only one way. It is through the process of temptation. In the combats of temptation, the truth that we know is put to use. As a result, the love of self is subdued, contempt for others is put aside, and the Lord’s mercy flows in. A heart of stone is taken away, and a new heart is given. As it is written, “I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit within you; I will take the heart of stone out of your flesh and give you a heart of flesh” (Ezekiel 36:26). This is what can happen to anyone who is willing to “take up one’s cross and follow Jesus” — that is, live according to the truth that Jesus teaches.

We can see, then, that Jesus uses this opportunity to teach eternal lessons about marriage — not only about the marriage between one man and one woman, but also about the marriage of truth and goodness that must take place within every individual. Whether married or not, this internal marriage takes place through the process of spiritual temptation, the perennial combat of truth against falsity, good against evil. While Jesus does not reveal these more interior teachings, it is all there, contained within spiritually loaded phrase, “because of the hardness of your hearts.”

Temptations serve to break up our arrogant self-confidence — our “hardness of heart.” As our hearts begin to soften, we come to realize that without God we can do nothing. Through this process we become truly human. During these times of trial, we come face to face with the question, “Do we truly believe this or not?” And if we do believe, the only way to demonstrate our belief is to we put it to use, even when our lower nature is being stubbornly resistant. If we are successful in subduing our lower nature while compelling our will to apply the truth, the result is an internal marriage of the truth we know with our desire to live according to it. This is the very marriage that God had in mind from the very beginning of creation — a heavenly marriage of goodness and truth within us. This, then, is the spiritual meaning of the words “What God has joined together, let not man separate” (19:9). ⁹

Is it Better Not to Marry?

10. His disciples say to Him, “If the case of the man be so with the wife, it is not expedient to wed.”

11. But He said to them, “All do not take in this word, but [they] to whom it is given.

12. For there are eunuchs who were so born from the mother’s womb; and there are eunuchs who were made eunuchs by men; and there are eunuchs who have made themselves eunuchs for the sake of the kingdom of the heavens. He that is able to take it in, let him take it in.”

As we have seen, Jesus uses external situations to teach more interior spiritual lessons. In this case, He is teaching not only about the external marriage between a man and a woman, but also about the marriage of truth (represented by “a man”) and goodness (represented by a “woman”) — an internal marriage that can take place within every individual. Therefore, when Jesus teaches that “a man shall leave his father and mother and cleave to his wife,” we need to understand this at both the natural and spiritual level. The spiritual message is that every human being must leave behind inherited tendencies to evil in order to receive a new will (“a wife”), that is, a new will that loves what is good. All of this is contained within Jesus’ literal statements. ¹⁰

But the religious leaders were not ready for those kinds of explanations. They demanded specific “yes” and “no” answers for their trick questions. So, Jesus gave them what they needed to hear. He tells them, “Whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery.” This was the clear, unequivocal message they needed to hear. Even if marriages were no longer considered sacred, they were still covenants for life. Jesus knew how destructive it would be for society if wives were simply put away for any reason. Therefore, He reinforced the teaching that the only reason for divorce could be adultery. Moreover, he took it a step further, saying, “And whoever marries her who has been put away also commits adultery” (19:9).

It’s easy to imagine that the disciples were confused. Jesus, who seems to be so open, so loving, and so forgiving about so many things, comes across as unusually firm about the law regarding divorce. So, they say to Jesus, “If such is the case, it is better not to marry” (19:10).

It should be remembered that it is the disciples — not Jesus — who suggest that it is perhaps better not to marry. Throughout the history of the Christian church there have been people who have believed that a celibate life is a higher spiritual path than a married one. Even Paul, who chose celibacy over marriage, said, “I wish that all men were as I myself [celibate] … and I say to the unmarried and to the widows: It is good for them if they remain even as I am; but if they cannot exercise self-control, let them marry. For it is better to marry than to burn with passion” (1 Corinthians 7:7-9).

Though Paul acknowledges that it is not a sin to marry, he does not recommend it. His anti-marriage advice continues: “Are you married? Do not seek a divorce. Are you unmarried? Do not look for a wife…. For those who marry will face many troubles in this life and I want to spare you this” (1 Corinthians 7:27-28). And then, to sum it all up, he writes, “So then, he who marries a virgin does right, but he who does not marry her does better” (1 Corinthians 7:38).

While some argue that Paul recommends celibacy only because there is an immediate crisis, others claim that he definitely teaches that celibacy is a higher path — not just for Paul’s time, but for all time. This is perhaps because Jesus Himself seems to teach the virtue of celibacy, especially when He adds these words: “There are eunuchs who were born thus from their mother’s womb, and there are eunuchs who were made eunuchs by men, and there are eunuchs who have made themselves eunuchs for the kingdom of heaven’s sake” (19:12). It would seem, at least on the surface, that Jesus might indeed be recommending celibacy.

But we need to explore the inner meaning of Jesus’ words.

Jesus is here referring to three types of men: those who have no sexual interest in women because they were born with undeveloped testes (“eunuchs who were born thus”); those who no longer have sexual interest in women because their testes were removed by others (“eunuchs who were made eunuchs by men”); and men who no longer have sexual interest in women because they have removed their own testes for religious purposes (“eunuchs who have made themselves eunuchs for the kingdom of heaven’s sake”). In each of these cases the common denominator seems to be no sexual interest in women.

But if this is really Jesus’ point, why does Jesus have such a high regard for marriage? Why does He, in the preceding episode, take the religious leaders back to the original plan of creation, reminding them that in the beginning God made people male and female and joined them together so that they would become “one flesh”? And why would He bless them and tell them to be fruitful and multiply? Obviously, God is not against marriage, nor is He against sexuality in marriage.

The “eunuch,” then, is a only symbol of spiritual purity — not a recommended religious path. In sacred symbolism a “eunuch” represents an individual who strives to shun adulterous lust out of love and respect for marriage. Such people have no desire to be united with evil, because they know that it is contrary to God’s will. Thus they have become spiritual “eunuchs” for the kingdom of heaven’s sake. ¹¹

When God created the world, and everything in it, He said it is “good.” And when He created man and woman on the sixth day, blessing them, and commanding them to be fruitful and multiply, He said. “Behold, it is very good” (Genesis 1:31). Therefore, it makes sense to conclude that God considers marriage, sexuality, and the production of offspring as a part of His plan. He wants us to marry, to have beautiful sexual relations with our marriage partner, and to produce offspring. Nothing could be simpler, or more wonderful.

Celibacy, on the other hand, is a deviation from God’s order. It prevents us from experiencing the highest happiness and the greatest blessing given to humanity: marriage. The marriage relationship — spiritual and physical — is the container of all heavenly and earthly joys. Sexuality in marriage is the most intimate physical relationship that can take place between a husband and wife. It is no wonder, then, that God has blessed this relationship with the highest of all physical delights — for it corresponds to the delight that the soul experiences when good and truth are united. ¹²

When Jesus responded to the question about putting wives away, He said, simply, “from the beginning it was not so.” These words remind us that the experience of falling in love and entering the marriage relationship brings us back to the innocence and purity of our childhood, where we can once again be “naked and not ashamed.” It is a time to be open with one another about all things, to love one another deeply and tenderly, and to promise eternal fidelity to each other. In many ways it is a lovely symbol, and perfect representation of our relationship with God — childlike, innocent, trusting, open, and eternal. Jesus compares this to three kinds of eunuch: the eunuch from his mother’s womb; the eunuch made so by men; and the eunuch who makes himself a eunuch for the kingdom of heaven.

The three types of eunuchs perfectly describe three ways of achieving a marriage relationship that is free of licentious desires. In the highest, most heavenly way, the love flows from a heart that has been newborn from the Lord. The relationship is innocent, chaste, and pure — without lust. Though there are sexual feelings, they are focused only on the beloved. These are “eunuchs who are born thus from their mother’s womb.”

The next type of eunuch describes the individual who learns the truths of revelation and applies them to life. These are the truths that help him to rise above every evil affection, especially those lusts that would destroy a marriage relationship. Because the term “men” in the Word signifies “truths,” these are the kinds of people who are described as “eunuchs who were made eunuchs by men.” ¹³

The third type of eunuch commits himself to marriage out of obedience. The commandment, “You shall not commit adultery” is enough. This is not the same as rising above licentiousness through truths given in the Word (“made eunuchs by men”); nor is it the same as developing a new heart that detests the very thought of adultery.

Nevertheless, “eunuchs” of this type are still welcomed by the Lord. These are “eunuchs who have made themselves eunuchs for the kingdom of heaven’s sake.” ¹⁴

The kind of struggle represented by the second and third stages can be painful and difficult. Nevertheless, if we want to enter into true marriage, must be willing to cut away every illicit desire and every wandering lust. Only then can we experience true marriage love.

The description of three kinds of eunuchs is Jesus’ response to the statement of the disciples, who said to Him, “If such be the case, it is better not to marry.” While deeply embedded in spiritual language about eunuchs, Jesus’ response is clear. It is better to marry. But it’s even better to cultivate a chaste love for one’s spouse, purified of lustful desire. In His description of the eunuchs, Jesus is not talking about sexual abstinence. Rather, He is talking about cultivating a love for one’s spouse, devoid of licentiousness, and in accordance with the commandment, “You shall not commit adultery.” ¹⁵

Jesus, of course, knew that most of this would be beyond the understanding of His disciples, so He ends this illustration with the words, “”He who is able to comprehend, let him comprehend” (19:12).

Let the Little Children Come to Me

13. Then were there brought to Him little children, that He should lay [His] hands on them, and pray; but the disciples rebuked them.

14. But Jesus said, “Let the little children come to Me, and forbid them not, for of such is the kingdom of the heavens.”

15. And laying hands on them, He went thence.

As we progress through these three stages in our marriage relationships, and in our lives, and if we strive to trust in the Lord through every stage, we will repeatedly return to that beginning state in which we are again like innocent, trusting children. Therefore, the very next episode begins with these words: “Then little children were brought to Him that He might put His hands on them and pray” (19:13). This represents the return of our innocent, trusting states — the “little ones” that Jesus spoke of in the preceding chapter.

These “little ones” never leave us, though they may be forgotten, apparently lost, and covered over by the love of self and cares of the world. It is therefore necessary that these tender states in us be once again drawn out; this happens whenever we feel touched by the hand of the Lord. “Then little children were brought to Him, that He might put His hands on them.”

The disciples are still confused and do not fully understanding what Jesus is doing. Like Peter, who rebuked the Lord for saying that He would have to go to Jerusalem and suffer many things (16:21), the disciples now rebuke those who bring little children to Jesus. Peter did not understand that the Lord’s temptations would be necessary for the salvation of the human race, just as our temptations are necessary for our regeneration. Nor did he realize that the “little children” that Jesus touched represent those tender aspects of ourselves that the Lord touches from time to time. This occurs especially after the combats of temptation when we realize that we have no power of our own, and that we are completely dependent upon the Lord — very much like children who are completely dependent on their parents.

This is our return to innocence, where we are once again like little children. Therefore, Jesus says, “Let the little children come to Me, and do not forbid them; for such is the kingdom of heaven” (19:14). It is an invitation to each of us to come to the Lord, as His children, entirely dependent on Him for our spiritual sustenance. As the “little ones” in us feel the touch of His spirit, we receive His life. Therefore, this episode ends with the words, “And laying hands on them, He departed from there” (19:15).

The Rich Young Ruler

16. And behold, one coming said to Him, “Good Teacher, what good shall I do that I may have eternal life?”

17. And He said to him, “Why callest thou Me good? None is good except One, God; but if thou willest to enter into the life, keep the commandments.”

18. He says to Him, “Which?” And Jesus said, “This, that thou shalt not murder, thou shalt not commit adultery, thou shalt not steal, thou shalt not bear false witness,

19. Honor thy father and mother; and, thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself.”

20. The young man says to Him, “All these things have I guarded from my youth; in what am I yet lacking?”

21. Jesus declared to him, “If thou willest to be perfect, go, sell thy belongings, and give to the poor, and thou shalt have treasure in heaven; and come, follow Me.”

22. But when the young man heard the word, he went away sorrowful; for he had many possessions.

The divine narrative now continues with the story of a rich young ruler who asks, “What good thing shall I do, that I may have eternal life?” (19:16). Note the emphasis here upon action rather than attitude. In the preceding series, the primary focus has been upon an attitude of humility. Even forgiveness, though it is expressed in certain physical actions, is essentially an attitude. The rich young ruler, however, lives under the delusion that heaven can be merited by certain external actions, rather than a fundamental change of attitude. Therefore he asks, “What good thing shall I do . . .”

The young man’s need for a change of attitude is made very clear in Jesus’ response to his question. When the young man addresses Jesus as “Good, teacher,” Jesus points out that no person, from himself, is good. All goodness is from God alone. Therefore, He says, “Why do you call Me good? No one is good but One, that is, God” (16:17). In other words, we should not take merit for the good that we do, since all good comes from God.

Nevertheless, Jesus says to the rich young ruler, “If you want to enter into life, keep the commandments” (19:17). This catches the young man’s attention, for he certainly seems desirous of doing “the right thing” so that he may get into heaven. Therefore, he asks, “Which ones?” as if certain commandments are of more help than others in meriting heaven. Jesus tells him explicitly: “You shall not murder, you shall not commit adultery, you shall not steal, you shall not bear false witness, honor your father and your mother, and you shall love your neighbor as yourself.” (19:19). This is good news for the young man, who replies: “All these things I have kept from my youth. What do I still lack?” (19:20)

The young man still believes that he can merit heaven by all of his “doing.” He seems to be quite proud of himself, perhaps even bragging, when he says, “All these things I have kept from my youth.” He has not yet come to acknowledge that the good he does derives from God, and that without God, He can do nothing. It is this humility which he lacks. But rather than tell him this directly, Jesus responds in the language of parable, saying, “ If you want to be perfect, go, sell what you have and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven; and come follow Me” (19:21). We read, however, that this is too much for the young man who goes away sorrowful, for he has great possessions” (19:22).

In the context of all that has preceded, Jesus’ words, “sell what you have” mean that we should get rid of the belief that our riches are our own, acknowledging instead that without God, we are indeed poor. But in so far as we do this — that is, in so far as we attribute all that we have to God — we become rich indeed. In acknowledging our spiritual poverty, God can fill us with the kingdom of heaven. “This is what Jesus means when He says, “give to the poor” (acknowledge our spiritual poverty), and you will have treasure in heaven (God will fill us with every spiritual blessing). It is another way of repeating the opening words from His Sermon on the Mount: “Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven” (5:3).

All of this, however, depends on whether or not we are willing to “follow” Jesus, that is, do His will. This is what is meant by Jesus’ invitation to the rich young ruler at the close of this episode, “Come, follow Me.”

Who then can be saved?

23. And Jesus said to His disciples, “Amen I say to you that with difficulty shall a rich [man] enter into the kingdom of the heavens.

24. And again, I say to you, It is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle, than for a rich man to enter into the kingdom of God.”

25. And when His disciples heard [it], they wondered greatly, saying, “Who then can be saved?”

26. But Jesus looking at [them] said to them, “With men this is impossible; but with God all things are possible.”

The rich young ruler knew many truths and had “kept them” from his youth. In this regard, he was spiritually “rich.” We, too, are blessed to know spiritual truth, and even more blessed when we live according to it. But true blessing only comes when we acknowledge that every truth we have, along with the ability to understand it and apply it, is from the Lord alone. As long as we remain puffed up with pride and self-importance, no matter how much we know (spiritual riches), we can never enter the kingdom of God. As Jesus puts it, “It is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter into the kingdom of God” (19:24).

Earthly wealth has never been, and never will be, a hindrance to the kingdom of God. ¹⁶ Conversely, physical poverty has never been, and never will be, a guarantee of admission. But pride of intellect and arrogant self-confidence will surely keep us out of heaven, while genuine humility, contriteness of heart, and trust in God, will surely open heaven’s gates. Ultimately, all of our knowledge, along with our achievements and successes, are useless unless we acknowledge that it is all from the Lord. This is what Jesus means when He says, “It is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter into the kingdom of God.”

When the disciples hear this, they are “exceedingly amazed” and say, “Who then can be saved?” (19:25). The disciples are amazed because they have never thought beyond the idea of personal merit. They have grown up in the traditional belief that people are saved by a rigid adherence to religious laws. But Jesus is teaching them something new. The rich young ruler has kept all the commandments. That’s good, but it’s not enough. Something more is needed. While keeping the commandments is commendable, they need to be kept with a right attitude. And that attitude is the humble acknowledgment that even the power to keep the commandments is from the Lord. It is for this reason that Jesus responds to their question, “Who then can be saved?” with this answer, “With men this is impossible, but with God all things are possible” (19:26). ¹⁷

Sitting on Thrones

27. Then Peter answering said to Him, Behold, we have left all and followed Thee; what then shall we have?

28. And Jesus said to them, Amen I say to you, that you who have followed Me in the regeneration, when the Son of Man shall sit on the throne of His glory you also shall sit on twelve thrones, judging the twelve tribes of Israel.

29. And everyone that has left houses, or brothers, or sisters, or father, or mother, or wife, or children, or fields, for My name’s sake, shall receive a hundredfold, and shall inherit eternal life.

30. But many [who are] first shall be last, and the last first.

Peter is watching and listening intently. Remembering that Jesus told the young man to “Sell what you have … and follow Me,” Peter says to Jesus, “See, we have left all and followed You.” He then adds, “Therefore what shall we have?” (19:27). Peter’s question,“What shall we have?” reveals that he doesn’t quite understand what Jesus is teaching. Peter still thinks of heaven as a reward — as something you receive for doing the right thing. His question is not very different from that of the young ruler who asks, “What good thing shall I do that I may have eternal life?” For both Peter and the rich young ruler — as for each of us — it takes time and maturity to discover that the rewards of heavenly life consist in the delights of doing good — without any thought of reward. ¹⁸

Jesus, nevertheless, not wanting to discourage Peter or the disciples, says, “Assuredly I say to you, that in the regeneration, when the Son of Man sits on the throne of His glory, you who have followed Me will also sit on twelve thrones, judging the twelve tribes of Israel” (19:28). This must have sounded like wonderful news to the disciples, who all along had been hoping that Jesus would fulfill His role as Messiah and become the new King of Israel. And now, along with this exciting declaration, Jesus tells them that each of them will sit on a throne “judging the twelve tribes of Israel.” Though they have been with Jesus for quite some time and have been listening to His preaching about humility, they are still in a natural state, susceptible to worldly ambition, and probably delighted to hear that they will be sitting on thrones in the coming kingdom. ¹⁹

Jesus often speaks in accommodation to the merely natural state of His disciples. While He knows that the future holds no literal thrones for them, He also knows they will indeed sit on a different kind of throne — the throne of divine truth. From these thrones, they will have new perceptions; they will be able to identify evil tendencies in themselves, and notice false ideas arising in their minds. And then, like kings summoning their soldiers to battle, they will summon up truth to combat and overcome these spiritual invaders. ²⁰

When Jesus says, “You will sit on twelve thrones,” He means that whenever we are willing to be led by the divine truth (the Son of Man), we will be able to dispel the evils and falsities that attempt to invade our mind. Our power will be like that of a king, for it will be power from divine truth. Nevertheless, we must never claim that power as our own. The moment we do so, we will instantly lose all power. ²¹

As the disciples come to realize that all power is from the Lord, they will have real spiritual power. This is what Jesus promises the disciples, even though His language is clothed in worldly appearances. Jesus’ words contain a great and wonderful promise for each of us — not just for the disciples. As we continue our spiritual development, successively letting go of all attachments and possessions (honor, reputation, and materialistic gain), we will receive in exchange, wondrous heavenly blessings. This is what Jesus means when He says in the next verse, “Everyone who has left houses or brothers or sisters or father or mother or wife or children or lands for My name’s sake, shall receive a hundredfold, and inherit everlasting life” (19:29).

Returning to the connections between episodes, it should be noted that Jesus has just delivered a wonderful discourse on the beauty and sanctity of marriage (19:4-8). Therefore, it would not be reasonable for Him to suddenly switch gears and now speak against it, encouraging husbands to leave their wives in order to follow Him.

Unfortunately, in the history of Christianity, people have taken these words literally; they have actually abandoned their wives and their children in order to follow Jesus.

It should always be remembered that Jesus speaks in parables, using physical objects (seeds, water, houses, etc.) and relationships (wife, brother, father, etc.) to signify spiritual realities. ²² In this case Jesus is speaking about the false concepts and negative emotions that we are to leave behind in order to follow Him. The “houses” signify our old ways of thinking — our belief systems; “brothers and sisters” signify the specific thoughts and affections that are within these belief systems; “father and mother” signify the inherited tendencies toward falsity and evil we have acquired from parents; “wife and children and lands” signify additional tendencies toward falsity and evil acquired and passed on during our lives. ²³

Thus, in order to follow Jesus, all this must be left behind — not literally our brothers and sisters, wives and children, but rather everything signified by these terms: our selfish habits of thought, our focus on earthly rather than heavenly rewards, our tendencies towards evils of every kind. All this is what we must leave behind if we are to inherit “everlasting life” (19:29). Clearly, this must have a spiritual meaning, for everywhere else Jesus urges us to love one another, especially parents, spouses, children, neighbors — and even our enemies. Jesus, then, is not calling us away from loving others; rather He is calling us away from those selfish loves that destroy our relationships with others.

As this episode draws to a close, Jesus provides the answer that the rich young ruler has been seeking. The original question was, “What good thing shall I do that I might have eternal life.” And the answer is simple: We must, of course, keep the commandments. But we must also be willing to give up everything that prevents us from receiving the kingdom of heaven. In order to do so, we must become as a child — humble, obedient, and willing to be led. Certainly, this is the very opposite of what the disciples understand by “sitting on thrones” where they envision themselves as ruling, commanding, and judging over others. But the disciples are still in training, and Jesus is patient with them — just as He is with us. For now, it is enough for them to look forward to pre-eminence and glory in His coming kingdom.

But it will be like no kingdom on earth, and they should expect surprises. Therefore, Jesus closes this episode with a warning about seeing themselves as “first” in the coming kingdom. Jesus says, “Many who are first will be last, and the last first” (19:30).

Footnotes:

156. 14. The state of marriage is preferable to a state of celibacy. This follows from what has been said so far about marriage and celibacy. The state of marriage is preferable because it exists from creation; because the origin of it is the marriage between good and truth; because it corresponds to the marriage of the Lord and the church; because the church and conjugial love are constant companions; and because the use it serves is more excellent than the uses served by anything else in creation, seeing that it results, according to order, in the propagation of the human race, and also of the angelic heaven, since heaven exists from the human race. In addition to this, marriage is the completion of a person, for by marriage a person becomes a complete person, as we show next in the following chapter. ¹ None of these things is true of celibacy.

[2] On the other hand, if one takes the proposition that a state of celibacy is better than the state of marriage and turns it over to an inquisition to approve and confirm by arguments, then these arguments lead to the following conclusions: That marriage is not sacred, nor can any marriage be chaste. Indeed, that chastity in the female sex is possible only in the case of those who refrain from marrying and take a vow of perpetual virginity. And moreover, that people who take a vow of perpetual celibacy are the kind of people meant by "eunuchs who make themselves eunuchs for the sake of the kingdom of God" (Matthew 19:12). Besides many other conclusions which, stemming from an untrue premise, are also untrue.

"Eunuchs who make themselves eunuchs for the sake of the kingdom of God" mean spiritual eunuchs, and these are people who in their marriages abstain from the evils of licentious relationships. The statement plainly does not mean Italian castrati. ²

151r. [Numbering was repeated by the author] ³ To this I will append two narrative accounts. This is the first:

As I was returning home from the school of wisdom spoken of above in no. 132, on the way I saw an angel dressed in blue.

He attached himself to my side and said, "I see that you have come from one of the schools of wisdom and that you were pleased by what you heard there. I perceive, too, that you are not fully in this world, because you are at the same time in the natural world. You are therefore also not acquainted with our Olympian gymnasia, where sages of old meet and learn from newcomers from your world what changes and progressions the state of wisdom has gone through and is presently undergoing. This being the case, if you wish, I will take you to a place where many of the sages of old live, together with their descendants or disciples."

He then took me to a border region between the north and the east. And when from an elevation I looked out toward it, suddenly a city appeared, and on one side of it two hills, with the hill nearer the city being lower than the other.

And the angel said to me, "That city is called Athenaeum, the lower hill Parnassium, and the higher one Heliconeum. They are called by these names because in the city and around it live wise men of old from Greece, such as Pythagoras, Socrates, Aristippus, and Xenophon, along with their disciples and pupils."

I then asked about Plato and Aristotle. The angel said that they and their followers lived in another region, because they taught matters of reason having to do with the intellect, while the ones here taught matters of morality having to do with life.

[2] The angel said that scholarly envoys are frequently sent out from the city of Athenaeum to educated Christians, to find out from them what people presently think about God, the creation of the universe, the immortality of the soul, the nature of man compared to the nature of animals, and other things which are matters of interior wisdom. And the angel said that today a herald had announced an assembly, a sign that the envoys had found newcomers from the earth from whom they had heard some interesting news.

We then saw many people coming out of the city and from the surrounding area, some wearing laurel wreaths on their heads, some holding palm branches in their hands, some with books under their arms, and some with pens under the hair of the left temple.

We slipped in among them and together ascended. And lo, on the hill there was an octagonal palace, which they called the Palladium, and we went in. And behold, we saw there eight hexagonal alcoves, each with a set of bookcases in it, and also a table, at which the people with the laurel wreaths sat. Moreover, in the Palladium itself we saw benches carved out of stone, on which the rest of the people took their seats.

[3] And then a door opened on the left, through which two newcomers from earth were ushered in. And having first greeted them, one of those wearing the laurel wreaths asked: "What news do you have from earth?"

So the newcomers said, "The news is that some people resembling beasts, or beasts resembling people, have been found in a forest. From their facial and physical features, however, it has been reportedly learned that they were born human, and that they were lost or left in the forest when they were about two or three years old.

"According to the report," the newcomers said, "they are unable to express any thought verbally, nor are they able to learn how to articulate sound into the form of any word. Nor did they know what food was suitable for them, as animals do, but they thrust into their mouth things they found in the forest, both things fit to be eaten and things unfit - to mention only some of many other similar discoveries. As a result of these findings, some of the learned among us have formed a number of conjectures, and others conclusions, about the nature of human beings compared to the nature of animals."

[4] When they heard this, some of the sages of old inquired, "What conjectures and conclusions do they draw from these discoveries?"

The two newcomers then replied that there were a number of them, but that they could be reduced to the following:

1. By his own nature and also from birth, the human being is more stupid and thus worse off than any animal, and that is the way he turns out if he is not educated.

2. He can be educated because he learned how to make articulate sounds and thus to speak, and by that means began to express thoughts, and this gradually more and more, until he was able to formulate laws of society, though many of these laws are imprinted on animals from birth.

3. Animals have the same faculty of reason as human beings.

4. Therefore if animals could talk, they would reason on any subject as cleverly as human beings. It is an indication of their ability that they think in accordance with the same reason and prudence as human beings.

5. The intellect is no more than a modified form of light from the sun, aided by warmth, by means of the ether, so that it is only an activity of interior nature, and this activity can be raised to the point that it appears as wisdom.

6. It is therefore vain to believe that a person lives after death any more than an animal - unless perhaps, owing to an exhalation of the life of the body, he may possibly appear for several days after death as a vapor resembling a ghost, before it evaporates back into nature - in much the same way as a bush raised from the ashes appears in a likeness of its prior form.

7. Consequently, religion, which teaches life after death, is an invention to keep simple people in bondage from within by its laws, as they are kept in bondage from without by laws of the state.

To this the newcomers added, that that was merely how some clever people reasoned, but not the intelligent ones.

Their listeners then asked, "What is the reasoning of the intelligent ones?"

The newcomers answered that they had not heard, but it was what they supposed.

152r. ³ On hearing these things, the people who were sitting at the tables all said, "Oh, what the times are like on earth now! Alas, what changes wisdom has undergone! Has wisdom become ingenious nonsense? The sun has set and now stands beneath the earth diametrically opposite its zenith!

"From the evidence of the people left and found in the forest, who cannot see that that is what a human being is like without education? Is he not as he is taught? Is he not born in a greater state of ignorance than animals? Does he not have to learn to walk and talk? If he did not learn to walk, would he stand erect upon his feet? And if he did not learn to talk, would he mutter anything he thought? Is everyone not as he is taught, irrational from being taught falsities, and wise from being taught truths? And one who is irrational from being taught falsities - is he not entirely caught up in the fantasy that he is wiser than one who is wise from being taught truths? Are there not fools and lunatics who are no more human than the people found in the forest? Are persons without memory not similar to them?

[2] "From these considerations and observations, we ourselves conclude that a person without education is not human, and not an animal either, but that he is a form of life which can receive into himself that which makes a person human. And thus we conclude that he is not born human, but becomes human; and that a person is born such a form of life in order that he may be an organism receptive of life from God, so that he may become a vessel into which God can introduce every kind of good and which by union with Himself He can bless to eternity.

"We perceive from what you have said that wisdom today has become so nonexistent or nonsensical that people know nothing at all about the nature of the life of human beings compared to the nature of the life of animals. That is why they also do not know the nature of man's life after death. Nevertheless, those who could know it, but do not wish to know it and therefore deny it, as many of your Christians do - we can liken them to the people found in the forest. Not that they have become that stupid from a lack of education; but by relying on misconceptions of the senses, which are dark shadows of truths, they have made themselves that stupid."

153r. [repeated] ³ At this point, however, someone in the middle of the Palladium stood up, holding a palm branch in his hand, and said, "Explain, please, this mystery, how a human being, created in the image of God, could be changed into the form of a devil. I know that angels of heaven are images of God and that angels of hell are images of the devil; and the two forms are opposite each other, angels of hell being forms of madness, angels of heaven forms of wisdom. Tell us, therefore, how a human being, created in the image of God, could pass from the light of day into such darkness of night that he could deny God and eternal life."

[2] To this the masters replied in turn, first the Pythagoreans, then the Socratics, and afterwards the rest.

But there was among them a certain Platonist. He spoke last, and his opinion prevailed. He said that people of the Saturnian period or golden age knew and acknowledged that they were recipient forms of life from God, and wisdom was therefore engraved on their souls and hearts. And consequently, from the light of truth they saw truth, and through truths perceived good from the delight of a love for good.

"However," he said, "in subsequent ages, the human race fell away from acknowledging that all truth of wisdom and consequent goodness of love in them continually flowed in from God; and as they fell away from this acknowledgment, they ceased to be dwelling places of God. Moreover, speech with God and association with angels also then ceased. For the orientation of the inner faculties of their minds, which had been directed upwards by God to God, became more and more bent in a slanting direction outward to the world, so that it was directed by God to God through the world; and finally it was turned upside down in the opposite direction, which is downwards to self. And because God cannot be regarded by a person who is inwardly upside down and thus turned away, people separated themselves from God and became forms of hell or the devil.

[3] "It follows from this that, in the first ages, people acknowledged with their heart and soul that all goodness of love and so truth of wisdom came to them from God, and also that these virtues were virtues of God in them, so that they themselves were merely recipients of life from God and for this reason were called images of God, sons of God, and born of God. But it follows then that, in succeeding ages, they no longer acknowledged this with their heart and soul, but did so owing to a certain conviction of belief, and then as a result of traditional faith, and finally with the lips alone. And to acknowledge something like this with the lips alone is not really acknowledging. Indeed, it is to deny at heart.

"Consequently it can be seen what wisdom is like today on earth among Christians - even though with their written revelation they could be inspired by God - when they do not know the difference between man and animal. And because of this, many of them believe that if a person lives after death, so will an animal. Or, because an animal does not live after death, so neither will a person. Has not our spiritual light, which enlightens the sight of the mind, become darkness in them? And their natural light, which enlightens only the sight of the body - has it not become their refulgence?"

154r. ³ After this the people all turned to the two visitors and thanked them for their coming and for their account; and they begged them to report to their comrades what they had heard.

Then the visitors replied that they would convince their friends of this truth, that they are human to the extent that they attribute every good of charity and truth of faith to the Lord and not to themselves; and that in the same measure they become angels of heaven.

155r. ³ The second account:

One morning I was awakened by the sound of very sweet singing from some height above me. And being therefore in the first moment of awakening, which is more internal, peaceful and gentle than any other moment of the day, I could be kept for a while in the spirit, as though outside the body, and could attend keenly to the affection which was being expressed in song. (A song in heaven is nothing but an affection of the mind which is expressed vocally as a melody, for it is the sound of one speaking without spoken words, coming from the same affection of love which gives life to speech.)

In that state I perceived that it was an affection having to do with the delights of conjugial love, which was turned into song by wives in heaven. I noticed that this was so from the sound of the singing, in which those delights were variously expressed in marvelous ways.

After this I arose and looked out into the spiritual world. And lo, in the east, beneath the sun there, I saw what seemed to be golden rain. It was morning mist, descending in such quantity that, struck by the rays of the sun, it presented to my eyes the appearance of golden rain. Being still more fully awakened on account of it, I went out in spirit, and then, meeting by chance an angel, I asked him whether he saw the golden rain coming down from the sun.

[2] Answering, he replied that he saw it whenever he was thinking about conjugial love and then turned his eyes in that direction.

He said further, "That rain falls upon a hall where there are three husbands with their wives, who live at the center of an eastern paradise. This kind of rain seems to be falling from the sun upon that hall, because abiding in those husbands and wives is wisdom concerning conjugial love and its delights - in the husbands, wisdom concerning conjugial love, and in the wives, wisdom concerning its delights.

"But since I perceive that you are thinking about the delights of conjugial love, I will take you to that hall and introduce you."

So he led me through areas befitting a paradise to houses which were built with boards of olive wood, with two columns of cedar in front of the entrance; and having introduced me to the husbands, he asked that I be allowed, in their presence, to speak with their wives.

They then nodded and called their wives.

The wives looked searchingly into my eyes. So I asked, "What are you looking at?" They said, "We can see keenly what attraction you feel and therefore what affection you have, which is where your thought concerning love for the opposite sex comes from. And we see that although you are thinking about it intently, still you are thinking chastely." They then said, "What do you want us to tell you about it?"

So I replied, "Please tell me something about the delights of conjugial love."

And the husbands nodded, saying, "Reveal to them something about these delights, if you wish. Their ears are chaste."

[3] So they asked, "Who told you that we were the ones to ask about the delights of that love? Why not our husbands?"

Then I replied, "This angel who is with me, he told me privately that wives are vessels receptive of and sensitive to those delights, because they are born forms of love, and all delights have to do with love."

Smiling at this they answered, "Be discreet, and do not say such a thing unless it can be interpreted in more than one way, because it is a point of wisdom kept deeply hidden in the hearts of our sex, which is not revealed to any husband except to one who is in a state of truly conjugial love. There are many reasons for this, which we conceal within and keep to ourselves."

At that the husbands then said, "Our wives know all the states of our mind, nor is anything hidden from them. They see, perceive and feel whatever comes from our will. And we in turn know nothing of this in our wives. Wives have this gift, because they have very tender loves and feelings of almost blazing zeal for the preservation of the friendship and trust in marriage and thus for the preservation of both partners' happiness of life. This happiness they watch over for their husbands and themselves from a wisdom inherent in their love - wisdom which is so full of discretion that they will not and therefore cannot say that they are the lovers, but that they are the recipients of love."

I then asked why wives will not and so cannot say this.

The wives replied that if the least suggestion of anything like this were to slip from their lips, their husbands would be invaded with coldness, which would separate them from their bed, bedroom, and sight.

"But this happens," they said, "in the case of people who do not hold marriage sacred, and who therefore do not love their wives with a spiritual love. It is different with those who do. This love in their minds is spiritual, and in the body becomes natural as a result of that. We here in this hall experience the natural love as a result of a spiritual one, and consequently we confide to our husbands secrets about the delights we feel having to do with conjugial love."

[4] At this point, I respectfully asked them to reveal something of these secrets to me as well. And immediately they looked toward the window to the south, where suddenly a white dove appeared. Its wings shone as though with silver, and its head was adorned with a crown seemingly of gold. It was standing on a branch, which had an olive growing out from it.

As they saw the dove engaged in an attempt to spread its wings, the wives said, "We will reveal something. When that dove appears, it is a sign to us that we may."

They then said, "Every man has five senses: sight, hearing, smell, taste and touch. But we have also a sixth sense, which is a sense of all the delights of conjugial love in our husbands. We have this sense in the palms of our hands, whenever we touch our husbands' breasts, arms, hands or cheeks - especially their breasts - and also when we are touched by them. All the happy and pleasant states of the thoughts of their mind, and all the joys and delights of their heart, and the merry and cheerful feelings in their breast - these are then transmitted from them to us, taking form in us and becoming perceptible, discernible, and tangible. Moreover, we discern these things as keenly and as clearly as the ear discerns the melodies of songs, or as the tongue does the flavors of exquisite foods.

"In a word, the spiritual delights of our husbands take on a kind of natural embodiment in us. And for that reason, our husbands call us the sensory organs of chaste conjugial love and therefore of its delights. But this sense in our sex appears, continues, remains, and rises in the measure that our husbands love us for our wisdom and judgment, and in the measure that we love them in return for the same qualities in them. In heaven, this sense in our sex is called the interplay of wisdom with its love and of love with its wisdom."

[5] I was stirred by this with a desire to ask more questions, such as about the variety of the delights.

Answering, they said, "The variety is endless. However, we do not wish to say any more, and therefore we cannot, because the dove outside our window, with the olive branch under its feet, has flown away."

I then waited for its return, but in vain. Meanwhile, I asked the husbands, "Do you have a similar sense of conjugial love?"

And they replied, "We have one in general, but not in particular. We have a general sense of bliss, of delight, and of pleasant contentment, owing to the particular sensations of these in our wives. And this general sense, which we have from them, is like a peaceful serenity."

At these words, suddenly through the window a swan appeared, standing on the branch of a fig tree; and spreading its wings, it flew off.

Seeing this, the husbands said, "That is a sign for us to be silent about conjugial love. Come back from time to time, and perhaps more will be disclosed."

They then withdrew, and we departed.

Footnotes: