The Betrothal

A Christmas Doctrinal Class by Rev. Andrew M.T. Dibb

Now in the sixth month the angel Gabriel was sent by God to a city of Galilee named Nazareth, to a virgin betrothed to a man whose name was Joseph, of the house of David. The virgin's name was Mary. (Luke 1:26-27)

So begins the wonderful story of the Lord's conception in the Gospel of Luke. The scene is familiar to each of us: Mary is at home, when suddenly she sees the angel Gabriel and hears his words of great joy:

"Rejoice, highly favoured one, the Lord is with you; blessed are you among women!" (Luke 1:28)

An angel is a messenger of the Lord. In the Word angels came to bring wisdom and comfort, hope and the good news, the “euangellion” or Gospel, to those to whom the Lord wanted His presence revealed. This Gospel is the teaching that the Lord Jesus Christ was born into this world, that He made it possible for all people to be saved and brought into His kingdom. Thus the angel Gabriel came in excitement to Mary to inform her that she was the Lord’s choice as His natural mother.

When Mary saw the angel Gabriel, she didn't know that he was the human form of an entire society of angels. Nor did she know that his greatest love is to tell people about the Lord, especially that He would be born into the world to save the human race from spiritual bondage.

The scene of the angel Gabriel announcing to Mary that she would conceive and bear a son, and call His name Jesus, is one of the most poignant in the Word. Mary was a simple person, living in Galilee far away from the centre of worship at Jerusalem. She was neither highly educated nor socially well connected, except that she descended from Israel’s greatest king, David. There is a beautiful innocence in Mary’s simplicity. The last thing she expected in life was to see an angel. The image we have of Mary is of a demure young maiden, a virgin in every sense, for, as she said to the angel, 'I do not know a man'. Her state of life was that of a young woman about to embark on her married life to Joseph, but still living at home with her parents. The marriage had not yet been celebrated.

It is central to the Christmas story that Mary was betrothed to Joseph when the angel Gabriel appeared to her. This fact is mentioned in the lesson we read in the Gospel of Luke, where it is plainly stated that she was a 'virgin betrothed'. In Matthew we are again told that Mary was 'betrothed to Joseph'. This means that she had been promised as a wife to Joseph. In our culture, we would say that they were engaged to be married.

There are several good reasons why Mary should have been in this state when she conceived the Lord:

- In the Jewish Church of that time betrothal was considered marriage, although the marriage had not yet been consummated. This meant that the people around her considered Mary a woman, and it also meant that her mind was focusing on the upcoming marriage and future life as a wife and a mother.

- She was expected, during this period of betrothal, to remain in a state of order. She was not free to come into romantic contact with any other man, and she certainly was not permitted to have sexual intercourse with any man, including her husband to be.

The angel appeared to her in this state precisely for that reason - the child who was to be conceived needed to be conceived in a state of virginity, and there could be no question down the ages that Jesus was the son of an ordinary man. This is why Mary protested that she could not conceive because she 'had not known a man'.

There is a very good reason for this: the doctrines tell us that the human soul is transmitted as the living principle of the masculine seed. That soul, or internal human is passed from father to child, is an image of the father's own soul - although the life in it is from the Divine Itself. When a child is conceived, that human soul can receive life from the Lord, and, using the life in it, begins to draw from the mother the various substances needed to form the human body. When the child is born, he or she becomes an individual, drawing life from the Lord, and potential spiritual things from both mother and father, and the body from the mother. Thus there is a complete mixing of parents in the birth of a child.

When the angel Gabriel came to Mary, he announced the birth of the Lord. It was to be a miracle of all miracles, for according to prophecy a virgin would conceive and bear a son. He was conceived of the Holy Spirit. His soul was Divine, given to Him by the Father, or, put another way, the soul within Jesus was not limited and finite as our souls are, but infinite and eternal, and capable of overcoming the powers of hell and saving the human race.

Here's an excerpt from Swedenborg's work, Arcana Coelestia 1999: "But the Lord's Internal was Jehovah Himself, since He was conceived from Jehovah, who cannot be divided or become the relative of another, like a son who has been conceived from a human father. For unlike the human, the Divine is not capable of being divided but is and remains one and the same. To this Internal the Lord united the Human Essence. Moreover because the Lord's Internal was Jehovah it was not, like man's internal, a recipient form of life, but life itself. Through that union His Human Essence as well became life itself. Hence the Lord's frequent declaration that He is Life, as in John,

As the Father has Life in Himself, so He has granted the Son to have Life in Himself. John 5:26."

Yet even a soul such as that, if it is to live and walk amongst the people of this earth, must be clothed in a body. The Lord always operates within the boundaries of the order of creation - and order dictates that a soul must be clothed with a material body.

At first the father’s soul is clothed with human elements, for it begins as a reproduction of the father’s own soul, then,

"during its descent, … the soul is enveloped by elements of a type that have to do with the father's natural love. This is the source from which hereditary evil springs." (Conjugial Love 245)

And so the Lord needed an orderly environment in which to be born. Mary was chosen as His mother because, according to the Lord's all-seeing wisdom, He saw that she would be willing to carry this child, and she would be able to nurture Him in such a way that He would grow up prepared for the great work ahead of Him.

Yet Mary had to be in a state of order herself. In ancient Israel, to bear a child meant that she had to be married, and yet to preserve the honesty of the conception and ensure that the soul was Divine, not human, she had to be in the state before actual physical union with Joseph had taken place - otherwise the Lord could have been Joseph's son. So she had to be betrothed, and no motive should be found as a basis for accusations against the Virgin Birth.

It was partly for this reason that when Joseph heard that she was carrying a child he decided to put her away. Effectively this meant he planned to divorce her. According to the law of Moses, a betrothed woman carrying a child had broken the rules. Ideally speaking, the man responsible should be put to death. Joseph had no idea who the man was, but assumed that there was one. He was, however, a kind man, and so decided not 'to make her a public example', but to put her away privately.

It was at this juncture that the angel Gabriel came to Joseph in a dream, and soothed his fears. 'The child she is carrying,' the angel said, 'is conceived by the Holy Spirit.' Now Joseph understood, and the state of betrothal could continue, and order could be maintained so that the Lord could be born into this world with the full appearance of two loving parents, bound together in marriage after an orderly betrothal.

We now need to expand our vision of the Lord's life in this world. The conception of the Lord was but the first step in his development. He had to be born and grow up. His mind and body had to develop as does our own. The home of Mary and Joseph was needed to provide a stable and orderly environment for Him where He could live and grow, undergoing not only physical and mental development, but also the very processes by which His Divine soul could become present within His natural mind.

In picking these two people to be his 'parents' in the natural world, the Lord was able to provide for the future as well. The Word does not tell us anything about the marriage relationship between Joseph and Mary. We know that Joseph was obedient to the angel when he was told to take Mary and the infant Lord down to Egypt to escape Herod's cruelty. We know that each year they travelled to Jerusalem to celebrate the Passover. We know that had other children, whom likewise they loved and nurtured. But that is about all we know.

The book, Conjugial Love, by Emanuel Swedenborg, however, gives us some insights into the kind of orderly relationship they had. They begin in the concept of Betrothal, for betrothal is introductory to marriage. The kinds of preparation people make for their marriages determine a great deal the course their marriage will follow. The fact that Mary in her betrothed state had 'not known a man' indicates that she took the responsibilities of that state serious. Similarly, the fact that Joseph immediately knew that he was not the father of the child Mary carried indicates a similar seriousness about the state of betrothal. They were both innocent of any wrongdoing, and were obviously committed to building a life together based on the firm foundation of proper preparation.

Their betrothal prepared them for their future life together as man and wife, and, thus as the Lord's parents on earth. Betrothal is a preparation for marriage. It is a time when the minds and spirits of the two partners begin to grow together.

The teachings of the New Church tell us that true marriage, or conjugial love as it is often called, is a meeting and union of two minds. A true marriage is one in which the couple recognises the essential differences between masculinity and femininity, and rejoices in those differences without any attempt to dominate the other. In order for a couple to come into a true appreciation of each other, they need to put aside physical love to foster and nurture spiritual love. This is why Mary and Joseph lived apart during this stage of their relationship, and why they refrained from sexual activity, for in that way they made it possible for their minds to soar, and be united at the highest levels of idealism.

The book Conjugial Love tells us that in this state the mind of each partner is opened by his or her spiritual love. They are able to reach higher levels of love and commitment to each other as they foster the growth of mutual understanding unencumbered by physical things. The passage describing this development, then, goes on to describe how when a couple marry their love descends from the mind to the body. It is worth reflecting on the statement that

"It needs to be known that the quality of conjugial love as it comes down is determined by the height to which it climbs. If it reaches the heights it comes down chaste, but if it does not, it comes down as unchaste." (Conjugial Love 302).

With Mary and Joseph we can but only assume that their love reached its heights during their betrothal, and that their marriage was one of purity and chastity. Chastity in this sense means a marriage love between two people that has been cleansed of all impurities. In such a state the husband and wife enjoy the full pleasures of marriage, beginning on the spiritual level with a full meeting of minds, and descends into the body, where their love is consummated.

A marriage of this kind provides the most wonderful environment, for the love between the husband and wife provides a state of tranquillity and peace in which children can be reared. This is the kind of environment the Lord chose to be born into. He knew that during his life in this world He would have to face the most terrible of temptations. He knew that He would have to battle against hell continuously, and face the disbelief of the people around Him. His first thirty-three years were a preparation for this work lying before Him. And so He chose to be born to a couple who were in a state of order, who because of that order, were willing to receive Him into their lives, to nurture Him as if He was their own.

There is a message in this for us. Each one of us wants the Lord to be born into our own lives, and He is willing to come to us. "Behold,' He says, 'I stand at the door and knock'. Yet He can only enter into us to the degree that we bring our lives into order. Mary and Joseph clung to their betrothal - they committed themselves and stood fast. That is what the Lord wants us to do: to commit ourselves to Him, to live according to His Word in every detail of our lives, especially in our relationships with others, in our preparation for marriage, and in our marriages themselves. As we do, then He enters into us, establishes His presence there, and lifts us up to heaven.

AMEN

Lessons:

Deuteronomy 22:25-29

Isaiah 7:14-16

Luke 1:26-38

Conjugial Love 302

32. 3. The Lord made the human nature divine from the divine nature within himself. There is support for this in many passages in the Word. Here we select passages that support the following points.

a. This happened step by step:

Jesus grew and became strong in spirit and in wisdom, and the grace of God was upon him. (Luke 2:40)

Jesus increased in wisdom and age, and in favor with God and humankind. (Luke 2:52)

[2] b. The divine nature worked through the human nature the way a soul works through its body:

The Son cannot do anything on his own unless he sees the Father doing it. (John 5:19)

I do nothing of myself; as my Father taught me I say these things. The one who sent me is with me; he has not left me alone. (John 8:28-29; 5:30)

I have not spoken on my own authority; the Father who sent me has given me a commandment regarding what I should say and what I should speak. (John 12:49-50)

The words that I speak to you I do not speak on my own authority; the Father who dwells in me does these works. (John 14:10)

I am not alone, because the Father is with me. (John 16:32)

[3] c. The divine nature and the human nature worked in complete accord:

Whatever the Father does, the Son also does in the same way. (John 5:19)

Just as the Father raises the dead and brings them to life, so also the Son brings to life those whom he wishes to. (John 5:21)

Just as the Father has life in himself, so he has also granted the Son to have life in himself. (John 5:26)

Now they know that all things you have given me are from you. (John 17:7)

[4] d. The divine nature was united to the human nature and the human nature to the divine:

“If you have known me you have also known my Father and have seen him.” When Philip wanted to see the Father, Jesus said, “Have I been with you for so long, and yet you have not known me, Philip? Those who have seen me have seen the Father. Do you not believe that I am in the Father and the Father is in me? Believe me that I am in the Father and the Father is in me.” (John 14:7-11)

If I am not doing the works of my Father, do not believe me. If I am doing them, believe the works, so that you may know and believe that the Father is in me and I am in the Father. (John 10:37-38)

... so that they all may be one, as you, Father, are in me and I am in you. (John 17:21)

On that day you will know that I am in my Father. (John 14:20)

No one will snatch the sheep from my Father’s hand. I and the Father are one. (John 10:29-30)

The Father loves the Son and has given all things into his hand. (John 3:35)

All things that the Father has are mine. (John 16:15)

All that is mine is yours, and all that is yours is mine. (John 17:10)

You have given the Son power over all flesh. (John 17:2)

All power has been given to me in heaven and on earth. (Matthew 28:18)

[5] e. We should turn to the Divine-Human One, as we can see from the following passages:

... so that all people will honor the Son just as they honor the Father. (John 5:23)

If you had known me, you would also have known my Father. (John 8:19)

Those who see me see the one who sent me. (John 12:45)

If you have known me you have also known my Father, and from now on you know him and have seen him. (John 14:7)

Those who accept me accept the one who sent me. (John 13:20)

This is because no one can see the divinity itself that is called “the Father”; only the Divine-Human One can be seen. The Lord in fact said,

No one has ever seen God. The only-begotten Son, who is close to the Father’s heart, has made him visible. (John 1:18)

No one has seen the Father except the one who is with the Father. He has seen the Father. (John 6:46)

You have never heard the Father’s voice or seen what he looks like. (John 5:37)

[6] f. Since the Lord made his human nature divine from the divine nature within himself, and since we should turn to him and he is the Son of God, we are therefore to believe in the Lord who is both Father and Son, as we can see from the following passages.

Jesus said that as many as accepted him, he gave them power to become children of God and believe in his name. (John 1:12)

... so that all who believe in him will not perish but will have eternal life. (John 3:15)

God loved the world so much that he gave his only-begotten Son so that everyone who believes in him would have eternal life. (John 3:16)

Those who believe in the Son are not condemned; but those who do not believe have already been condemned because they have not believed in the name of the only-begotten Son of God. (John 3:18)

Those who believe in the Son have eternal life. Those who do not believe in the Son will not see life; instead, the wrath of God abides on them. (John 3:36)

The bread of God is the one who comes down from heaven and gives life to the world. Those who come to me will not hunger, and those who believe in me will never thirst. (John 6:33, 35)

This is the will of the one who sent me, that all those who see the Son and believe in him will have eternal life, and I will raise them up on the last day. (John 6:40)

They said to Jesus, “What should we do in order to perform the works of God?” Jesus answered, “This is the work of God, that you believe in the one whom he has sent.” (John 6:28-29)

Truly I say to you, those who believe in me have eternal life. (John 6:47)

Jesus cried out, saying, “If any are thirsty, they must come to me and drink. As the Scripture has said, from the bellies of those who believe in me will flow rivers of living water.” (John 7:37-38)

If you do not believe that I am, you will die in your sins. (John 8:24)

Jesus said, “I am the resurrection and the life. Even if they die, those who believe in me will live; and anyone who lives and believes in me will never die.” (John 11:25-26)

Jesus said, “I have come into the world as a light so that anyone who believes in me will not remain in darkness.” (John 12:46; 8:12)

While you have the light, believe in the light, so that you may become children of the light. (John 12:36)

I tell you truly, the dead will hear the voice of the Son of God, and those who hear will live. (John 5:25)

Abide in me, and I [will abide] in you. I am the vine; you are the branches. Those who abide in me and in whom I abide bear much fruit, because without me you cannot do anything. (John 15:1-5)

They were to abide in the Lord, and the Lord in them. (John 14:20; 17:23)

I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me. (John 14:6)

[7] In these passages and all others, when it mentions “the Father” it means the divine nature that was in the Lord from his conception, which-according to the teaching embraced by the Christian world regarding faith-was like the soul within the body in human beings. The human nature that came from this divine nature is the Son of God.

Now, since this was also made divine, in order to prevent people from turning to the Father alone and thereby separating the Father from the Lord (in whom the Father dwells) in their thought, faith, and worship, the Lord went on to teach that the Father and he are one and that the Father is in him and he is in the Father, and that we are to abide in him; also that no one comes to the Father except through him. He also tells us that we are to believe in him and that we are saved by a faith focused directly on him.

[8] For many Christians, it is impossible to grasp the concept that in the Lord a human nature was made divine, primarily because they think of “human” only in terms of the physical body and not in terms of anything spiritual. Yet all angels, who are spiritual beings, also have a completely human form, and everything divine that emanates from Jehovah God, everything from its first [or innermost] level in heaven to its last [or outermost] level on earth, tends to take on a human form.

On angels as human forms and on everything divine tending toward the human form, see Heaven and Hell 73-77, 453-460. There will also be more on this subject in forthcoming works that will draw on angelic wisdom about the Lord.