The Betrothal

A Christmas Doctrinal Class by Rev. Andrew M.T. Dibb

Now in the sixth month the angel Gabriel was sent by God to a city of Galilee named Nazareth, to a virgin betrothed to a man whose name was Joseph, of the house of David. The virgin's name was Mary. (Luke 1:26-27)

So begins the wonderful story of the Lord's conception in the Gospel of Luke. The scene is familiar to each of us: Mary is at home, when suddenly she sees the angel Gabriel and hears his words of great joy:

"Rejoice, highly favoured one, the Lord is with you; blessed are you among women!" (Luke 1:28)

An angel is a messenger of the Lord. In the Word angels came to bring wisdom and comfort, hope and the good news, the “euangellion” or Gospel, to those to whom the Lord wanted His presence revealed. This Gospel is the teaching that the Lord Jesus Christ was born into this world, that He made it possible for all people to be saved and brought into His kingdom. Thus the angel Gabriel came in excitement to Mary to inform her that she was the Lord’s choice as His natural mother.

When Mary saw the angel Gabriel, she didn't know that he was the human form of an entire society of angels. Nor did she know that his greatest love is to tell people about the Lord, especially that He would be born into the world to save the human race from spiritual bondage.

The scene of the angel Gabriel announcing to Mary that she would conceive and bear a son, and call His name Jesus, is one of the most poignant in the Word. Mary was a simple person, living in Galilee far away from the centre of worship at Jerusalem. She was neither highly educated nor socially well connected, except that she descended from Israel’s greatest king, David. There is a beautiful innocence in Mary’s simplicity. The last thing she expected in life was to see an angel. The image we have of Mary is of a demure young maiden, a virgin in every sense, for, as she said to the angel, 'I do not know a man'. Her state of life was that of a young woman about to embark on her married life to Joseph, but still living at home with her parents. The marriage had not yet been celebrated.

It is central to the Christmas story that Mary was betrothed to Joseph when the angel Gabriel appeared to her. This fact is mentioned in the lesson we read in the Gospel of Luke, where it is plainly stated that she was a 'virgin betrothed'. In Matthew we are again told that Mary was 'betrothed to Joseph'. This means that she had been promised as a wife to Joseph. In our culture, we would say that they were engaged to be married.

There are several good reasons why Mary should have been in this state when she conceived the Lord:

- In the Jewish Church of that time betrothal was considered marriage, although the marriage had not yet been consummated. This meant that the people around her considered Mary a woman, and it also meant that her mind was focusing on the upcoming marriage and future life as a wife and a mother.

- She was expected, during this period of betrothal, to remain in a state of order. She was not free to come into romantic contact with any other man, and she certainly was not permitted to have sexual intercourse with any man, including her husband to be.

The angel appeared to her in this state precisely for that reason - the child who was to be conceived needed to be conceived in a state of virginity, and there could be no question down the ages that Jesus was the son of an ordinary man. This is why Mary protested that she could not conceive because she 'had not known a man'.

There is a very good reason for this: the doctrines tell us that the human soul is transmitted as the living principle of the masculine seed. That soul, or internal human is passed from father to child, is an image of the father's own soul - although the life in it is from the Divine Itself. When a child is conceived, that human soul can receive life from the Lord, and, using the life in it, begins to draw from the mother the various substances needed to form the human body. When the child is born, he or she becomes an individual, drawing life from the Lord, and potential spiritual things from both mother and father, and the body from the mother. Thus there is a complete mixing of parents in the birth of a child.

When the angel Gabriel came to Mary, he announced the birth of the Lord. It was to be a miracle of all miracles, for according to prophecy a virgin would conceive and bear a son. He was conceived of the Holy Spirit. His soul was Divine, given to Him by the Father, or, put another way, the soul within Jesus was not limited and finite as our souls are, but infinite and eternal, and capable of overcoming the powers of hell and saving the human race.

Here's an excerpt from Swedenborg's work, Arcana Coelestia 1999: "But the Lord's Internal was Jehovah Himself, since He was conceived from Jehovah, who cannot be divided or become the relative of another, like a son who has been conceived from a human father. For unlike the human, the Divine is not capable of being divided but is and remains one and the same. To this Internal the Lord united the Human Essence. Moreover because the Lord's Internal was Jehovah it was not, like man's internal, a recipient form of life, but life itself. Through that union His Human Essence as well became life itself. Hence the Lord's frequent declaration that He is Life, as in John,

As the Father has Life in Himself, so He has granted the Son to have Life in Himself. John 5:26."

Yet even a soul such as that, if it is to live and walk amongst the people of this earth, must be clothed in a body. The Lord always operates within the boundaries of the order of creation - and order dictates that a soul must be clothed with a material body.

At first the father’s soul is clothed with human elements, for it begins as a reproduction of the father’s own soul, then,

"during its descent, … the soul is enveloped by elements of a type that have to do with the father's natural love. This is the source from which hereditary evil springs." (Conjugial Love 245)

And so the Lord needed an orderly environment in which to be born. Mary was chosen as His mother because, according to the Lord's all-seeing wisdom, He saw that she would be willing to carry this child, and she would be able to nurture Him in such a way that He would grow up prepared for the great work ahead of Him.

Yet Mary had to be in a state of order herself. In ancient Israel, to bear a child meant that she had to be married, and yet to preserve the honesty of the conception and ensure that the soul was Divine, not human, she had to be in the state before actual physical union with Joseph had taken place - otherwise the Lord could have been Joseph's son. So she had to be betrothed, and no motive should be found as a basis for accusations against the Virgin Birth.

It was partly for this reason that when Joseph heard that she was carrying a child he decided to put her away. Effectively this meant he planned to divorce her. According to the law of Moses, a betrothed woman carrying a child had broken the rules. Ideally speaking, the man responsible should be put to death. Joseph had no idea who the man was, but assumed that there was one. He was, however, a kind man, and so decided not 'to make her a public example', but to put her away privately.

It was at this juncture that the angel Gabriel came to Joseph in a dream, and soothed his fears. 'The child she is carrying,' the angel said, 'is conceived by the Holy Spirit.' Now Joseph understood, and the state of betrothal could continue, and order could be maintained so that the Lord could be born into this world with the full appearance of two loving parents, bound together in marriage after an orderly betrothal.

We now need to expand our vision of the Lord's life in this world. The conception of the Lord was but the first step in his development. He had to be born and grow up. His mind and body had to develop as does our own. The home of Mary and Joseph was needed to provide a stable and orderly environment for Him where He could live and grow, undergoing not only physical and mental development, but also the very processes by which His Divine soul could become present within His natural mind.

In picking these two people to be his 'parents' in the natural world, the Lord was able to provide for the future as well. The Word does not tell us anything about the marriage relationship between Joseph and Mary. We know that Joseph was obedient to the angel when he was told to take Mary and the infant Lord down to Egypt to escape Herod's cruelty. We know that each year they travelled to Jerusalem to celebrate the Passover. We know that had other children, whom likewise they loved and nurtured. But that is about all we know.

The book, Conjugial Love, by Emanuel Swedenborg, however, gives us some insights into the kind of orderly relationship they had. They begin in the concept of Betrothal, for betrothal is introductory to marriage. The kinds of preparation people make for their marriages determine a great deal the course their marriage will follow. The fact that Mary in her betrothed state had 'not known a man' indicates that she took the responsibilities of that state serious. Similarly, the fact that Joseph immediately knew that he was not the father of the child Mary carried indicates a similar seriousness about the state of betrothal. They were both innocent of any wrongdoing, and were obviously committed to building a life together based on the firm foundation of proper preparation.

Their betrothal prepared them for their future life together as man and wife, and, thus as the Lord's parents on earth. Betrothal is a preparation for marriage. It is a time when the minds and spirits of the two partners begin to grow together.

The teachings of the New Church tell us that true marriage, or conjugial love as it is often called, is a meeting and union of two minds. A true marriage is one in which the couple recognises the essential differences between masculinity and femininity, and rejoices in those differences without any attempt to dominate the other. In order for a couple to come into a true appreciation of each other, they need to put aside physical love to foster and nurture spiritual love. This is why Mary and Joseph lived apart during this stage of their relationship, and why they refrained from sexual activity, for in that way they made it possible for their minds to soar, and be united at the highest levels of idealism.

The book Conjugial Love tells us that in this state the mind of each partner is opened by his or her spiritual love. They are able to reach higher levels of love and commitment to each other as they foster the growth of mutual understanding unencumbered by physical things. The passage describing this development, then, goes on to describe how when a couple marry their love descends from the mind to the body. It is worth reflecting on the statement that

"It needs to be known that the quality of conjugial love as it comes down is determined by the height to which it climbs. If it reaches the heights it comes down chaste, but if it does not, it comes down as unchaste." (Conjugial Love 302).

With Mary and Joseph we can but only assume that their love reached its heights during their betrothal, and that their marriage was one of purity and chastity. Chastity in this sense means a marriage love between two people that has been cleansed of all impurities. In such a state the husband and wife enjoy the full pleasures of marriage, beginning on the spiritual level with a full meeting of minds, and descends into the body, where their love is consummated.

A marriage of this kind provides the most wonderful environment, for the love between the husband and wife provides a state of tranquillity and peace in which children can be reared. This is the kind of environment the Lord chose to be born into. He knew that during his life in this world He would have to face the most terrible of temptations. He knew that He would have to battle against hell continuously, and face the disbelief of the people around Him. His first thirty-three years were a preparation for this work lying before Him. And so He chose to be born to a couple who were in a state of order, who because of that order, were willing to receive Him into their lives, to nurture Him as if He was their own.

There is a message in this for us. Each one of us wants the Lord to be born into our own lives, and He is willing to come to us. "Behold,' He says, 'I stand at the door and knock'. Yet He can only enter into us to the degree that we bring our lives into order. Mary and Joseph clung to their betrothal - they committed themselves and stood fast. That is what the Lord wants us to do: to commit ourselves to Him, to live according to His Word in every detail of our lives, especially in our relationships with others, in our preparation for marriage, and in our marriages themselves. As we do, then He enters into us, establishes His presence there, and lifts us up to heaven.

AMEN

Lessons:

Deuteronomy 22:25-29

Isaiah 7:14-16

Luke 1:26-38

Conjugial Love 302

9987. 'And this is the word which you shall do to them' means a law of order. This is clear from the meaning of 'the word' as Divine Truth, and consequently a law of order, dealt with below. The ordinary meaning of 'word' is an expression spoken by the mouth, or utterance; and since utterance is thought taking place in the mind which is expressed by means of vocal sounds, 'word' also means a thing that is being thought about. This explains why in the original language whatever comes into actual being and is indeed something is called 'a word'. But a grander meaning of 'word' is Divine Truth, because the source of all that comes into being and is indeed something is Divine Truth. This accounts for the statement in David,

By the Word of Jehovah were the heavens made, and all their host by the Spirit of His mouth. Psalms 33:6.

Here 'the Word of Jehovah' is Divine Truth emanating from the Lord; 'the Spirit of Jehovah's mouth' is the life brought by His Truth; and 'the heavens' made by His Word, also 'all their host', are angels, to the extent that they are recipients of Divine Truth. The reason why angels are meant by 'the heavens' is that they constitute heaven. Furthermore, since angels are recipients of Divine Truth, Divine Truths coming from the Lord are meant by them in the abstract sense, see 8192; and in that same sense 'the host of the heavens' means Divine Truths, 3448, 7236, 7988.

[2] From this it becomes clear what 'the Word' means in John,

In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. All things were made through Him, and without Him nothing was made that was made. And the Word became flesh and dwelt among us; and we saw His glory. John 1:1, 3, 14.

Here it is self-evident that the Word is used to mean the Lord, for it says that the Word became flesh. The Lord is the Word because while He was in the world the Lord was Divine Truth itself; and since His departure from the world Divine Truth has emanated from Him, see the places referred to in 9199 (end), 9315 (end).

[3] In the highest sense the Word is the Lord in respect of Divine Truth, or what amounts to the same thing, the Word is Divine Truth emanating from the Lord. This is clear from very many places, for example in David,

They cried out to Jehovah, and He sent His Word and healed them. Psalms 107:19-20.

In John,

You do not have the Father's word abiding in you, because the One whom He has sent, Him you do not believe; nor are you willing to come to Me that you may have life. John 5:38, 40.

In the same gospel,

I have given them Your word; therefore the world hates them. Sanctify them in Your truth; Your word is truth. John 17:14, 17.

And in the Book of Revelation,

The One seated on the white horse was clothed in a garment dyed with blood, and His name is called The Word of God. And on His garment and on His thigh He had a name written, King of kings and Lord of lords. Revelation 19:13, 16.

From these and many other places it is clear that Divine Truth emanating from the Lord is meant by 'the Word', and in the highest sense the Lord in respect of Divine Truth; for it says that the name of the One seated on the white horse is The Word of God, and that He is King of kings and Lord of lords. And since the Word is Divine Truth it says that He was clothed in a garment dyed with blood, for 'garment' means truth, 9952, and 'blood' truth from good, 9393. For a fuller explanation of these things, see 2760-2762.

[4] This now explains why every truth that comes from God is called His word, as in Joel,

Jehovah uttered His voice before His army, His camp is exceedingly great; for those who execute His word are uncountable. Joel 2:11.

'The voice' which Jehovah utters is the truth from God, 9926, Jehovah's 'camp' is heaven, 4236, 8193, 8196, from which it is evident that 'those who execute His word are uncountable' means those who do God's truth. In Matthew,

[As for the one] who hears the word of the kingdom and does not give heed to it, the evil one comes and snatches away what has been sown in his heart. [The one] who has been sown on stony ground is he who hears the word and immediately receives it with joy; yet he has no root. [The one] who is sown among thorns is he who hears the word but the cares of this world ¹ and the deceitfulness of riches choke the word. [The one] who is sown in good soil is he who hears the word and gives heed to it, and consequently bears fruit. Matthew 13:19-23.

It is evident without explanation that 'the word' here is God's truth. The expression 'the word of the kingdom' is used because it is the truth that is heaven and the Church's; for 'the kingdom' means heaven and the Church.

[5] From all this it becomes clear that 'words' means Divine Truths that come from the Lord, as in John,

The words that I speak to you, they are spirit and they are life. John 6:63.

Therefore also the ten commandments are called Ten Words in Exodus 34:28. The reason why 'the word' is a law of order is that Divine Truth emanating from the Lord brings order to the heavens, to such an extent that it constitutes order there. Consequently the laws of heavenly order consist of Divine Truths, see 1728, 1919, 2258, 2447, 4839, 5703, 7995, 8513, 8700, 8988. The law of order meant by 'the word' in this chapter is the manner in which the Lord glorified His Human, that is, made it Divine. This is the subject here in the internal sense, the subject in the relative sense consequently being human regeneration, since human regeneration is an image of the glorification of the Lord, 3138, 3212, 3245, 3246, 3296, 4402, 5688. The reason why this in particular is a law of order is that the Lord's Divine Human constitutes order in the heavens and everyone who is being regenerated is being remade to conform to that order. Those therefore with whom that order exists abide in the Lord.

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