The Betrothal

A Christmas Doctrinal Class by Rev. Andrew M.T. Dibb

Now in the sixth month the angel Gabriel was sent by God to a city of Galilee named Nazareth, to a virgin betrothed to a man whose name was Joseph, of the house of David. The virgin's name was Mary. (Luke 1:26-27)

So begins the wonderful story of the Lord's conception in the Gospel of Luke. The scene is familiar to each of us: Mary is at home, when suddenly she sees the angel Gabriel and hears his words of great joy:

"Rejoice, highly favoured one, the Lord is with you; blessed are you among women!" (Luke 1:28)

An angel is a messenger of the Lord. In the Word angels came to bring wisdom and comfort, hope and the good news, the “euangellion” or Gospel, to those to whom the Lord wanted His presence revealed. This Gospel is the teaching that the Lord Jesus Christ was born into this world, that He made it possible for all people to be saved and brought into His kingdom. Thus the angel Gabriel came in excitement to Mary to inform her that she was the Lord’s choice as His natural mother.

When Mary saw the angel Gabriel, she didn't know that he was the human form of an entire society of angels. Nor did she know that his greatest love is to tell people about the Lord, especially that He would be born into the world to save the human race from spiritual bondage.

The scene of the angel Gabriel announcing to Mary that she would conceive and bear a son, and call His name Jesus, is one of the most poignant in the Word. Mary was a simple person, living in Galilee far away from the centre of worship at Jerusalem. She was neither highly educated nor socially well connected, except that she descended from Israel’s greatest king, David. There is a beautiful innocence in Mary’s simplicity. The last thing she expected in life was to see an angel. The image we have of Mary is of a demure young maiden, a virgin in every sense, for, as she said to the angel, 'I do not know a man'. Her state of life was that of a young woman about to embark on her married life to Joseph, but still living at home with her parents. The marriage had not yet been celebrated.

It is central to the Christmas story that Mary was betrothed to Joseph when the angel Gabriel appeared to her. This fact is mentioned in the lesson we read in the Gospel of Luke, where it is plainly stated that she was a 'virgin betrothed'. In Matthew we are again told that Mary was 'betrothed to Joseph'. This means that she had been promised as a wife to Joseph. In our culture, we would say that they were engaged to be married.

There are several good reasons why Mary should have been in this state when she conceived the Lord:

- In the Jewish Church of that time betrothal was considered marriage, although the marriage had not yet been consummated. This meant that the people around her considered Mary a woman, and it also meant that her mind was focusing on the upcoming marriage and future life as a wife and a mother.

- She was expected, during this period of betrothal, to remain in a state of order. She was not free to come into romantic contact with any other man, and she certainly was not permitted to have sexual intercourse with any man, including her husband to be.

The angel appeared to her in this state precisely for that reason - the child who was to be conceived needed to be conceived in a state of virginity, and there could be no question down the ages that Jesus was the son of an ordinary man. This is why Mary protested that she could not conceive because she 'had not known a man'.

There is a very good reason for this: the doctrines tell us that the human soul is transmitted as the living principle of the masculine seed. That soul, or internal human is passed from father to child, is an image of the father's own soul - although the life in it is from the Divine Itself. When a child is conceived, that human soul can receive life from the Lord, and, using the life in it, begins to draw from the mother the various substances needed to form the human body. When the child is born, he or she becomes an individual, drawing life from the Lord, and potential spiritual things from both mother and father, and the body from the mother. Thus there is a complete mixing of parents in the birth of a child.

When the angel Gabriel came to Mary, he announced the birth of the Lord. It was to be a miracle of all miracles, for according to prophecy a virgin would conceive and bear a son. He was conceived of the Holy Spirit. His soul was Divine, given to Him by the Father, or, put another way, the soul within Jesus was not limited and finite as our souls are, but infinite and eternal, and capable of overcoming the powers of hell and saving the human race.

Here's an excerpt from Swedenborg's work, Arcana Coelestia 1999: "But the Lord's Internal was Jehovah Himself, since He was conceived from Jehovah, who cannot be divided or become the relative of another, like a son who has been conceived from a human father. For unlike the human, the Divine is not capable of being divided but is and remains one and the same. To this Internal the Lord united the Human Essence. Moreover because the Lord's Internal was Jehovah it was not, like man's internal, a recipient form of life, but life itself. Through that union His Human Essence as well became life itself. Hence the Lord's frequent declaration that He is Life, as in John,

As the Father has Life in Himself, so He has granted the Son to have Life in Himself. John 5:26."

Yet even a soul such as that, if it is to live and walk amongst the people of this earth, must be clothed in a body. The Lord always operates within the boundaries of the order of creation - and order dictates that a soul must be clothed with a material body.

At first the father’s soul is clothed with human elements, for it begins as a reproduction of the father’s own soul, then,

"during its descent, … the soul is enveloped by elements of a type that have to do with the father's natural love. This is the source from which hereditary evil springs." (Conjugial Love 245)

And so the Lord needed an orderly environment in which to be born. Mary was chosen as His mother because, according to the Lord's all-seeing wisdom, He saw that she would be willing to carry this child, and she would be able to nurture Him in such a way that He would grow up prepared for the great work ahead of Him.

Yet Mary had to be in a state of order herself. In ancient Israel, to bear a child meant that she had to be married, and yet to preserve the honesty of the conception and ensure that the soul was Divine, not human, she had to be in the state before actual physical union with Joseph had taken place - otherwise the Lord could have been Joseph's son. So she had to be betrothed, and no motive should be found as a basis for accusations against the Virgin Birth.

It was partly for this reason that when Joseph heard that she was carrying a child he decided to put her away. Effectively this meant he planned to divorce her. According to the law of Moses, a betrothed woman carrying a child had broken the rules. Ideally speaking, the man responsible should be put to death. Joseph had no idea who the man was, but assumed that there was one. He was, however, a kind man, and so decided not 'to make her a public example', but to put her away privately.

It was at this juncture that the angel Gabriel came to Joseph in a dream, and soothed his fears. 'The child she is carrying,' the angel said, 'is conceived by the Holy Spirit.' Now Joseph understood, and the state of betrothal could continue, and order could be maintained so that the Lord could be born into this world with the full appearance of two loving parents, bound together in marriage after an orderly betrothal.

We now need to expand our vision of the Lord's life in this world. The conception of the Lord was but the first step in his development. He had to be born and grow up. His mind and body had to develop as does our own. The home of Mary and Joseph was needed to provide a stable and orderly environment for Him where He could live and grow, undergoing not only physical and mental development, but also the very processes by which His Divine soul could become present within His natural mind.

In picking these two people to be his 'parents' in the natural world, the Lord was able to provide for the future as well. The Word does not tell us anything about the marriage relationship between Joseph and Mary. We know that Joseph was obedient to the angel when he was told to take Mary and the infant Lord down to Egypt to escape Herod's cruelty. We know that each year they travelled to Jerusalem to celebrate the Passover. We know that had other children, whom likewise they loved and nurtured. But that is about all we know.

The book, Conjugial Love, by Emanuel Swedenborg, however, gives us some insights into the kind of orderly relationship they had. They begin in the concept of Betrothal, for betrothal is introductory to marriage. The kinds of preparation people make for their marriages determine a great deal the course their marriage will follow. The fact that Mary in her betrothed state had 'not known a man' indicates that she took the responsibilities of that state serious. Similarly, the fact that Joseph immediately knew that he was not the father of the child Mary carried indicates a similar seriousness about the state of betrothal. They were both innocent of any wrongdoing, and were obviously committed to building a life together based on the firm foundation of proper preparation.

Their betrothal prepared them for their future life together as man and wife, and, thus as the Lord's parents on earth. Betrothal is a preparation for marriage. It is a time when the minds and spirits of the two partners begin to grow together.

The teachings of the New Church tell us that true marriage, or conjugial love as it is often called, is a meeting and union of two minds. A true marriage is one in which the couple recognises the essential differences between masculinity and femininity, and rejoices in those differences without any attempt to dominate the other. In order for a couple to come into a true appreciation of each other, they need to put aside physical love to foster and nurture spiritual love. This is why Mary and Joseph lived apart during this stage of their relationship, and why they refrained from sexual activity, for in that way they made it possible for their minds to soar, and be united at the highest levels of idealism.

The book Conjugial Love tells us that in this state the mind of each partner is opened by his or her spiritual love. They are able to reach higher levels of love and commitment to each other as they foster the growth of mutual understanding unencumbered by physical things. The passage describing this development, then, goes on to describe how when a couple marry their love descends from the mind to the body. It is worth reflecting on the statement that

"It needs to be known that the quality of conjugial love as it comes down is determined by the height to which it climbs. If it reaches the heights it comes down chaste, but if it does not, it comes down as unchaste." (Conjugial Love 302).

With Mary and Joseph we can but only assume that their love reached its heights during their betrothal, and that their marriage was one of purity and chastity. Chastity in this sense means a marriage love between two people that has been cleansed of all impurities. In such a state the husband and wife enjoy the full pleasures of marriage, beginning on the spiritual level with a full meeting of minds, and descends into the body, where their love is consummated.

A marriage of this kind provides the most wonderful environment, for the love between the husband and wife provides a state of tranquillity and peace in which children can be reared. This is the kind of environment the Lord chose to be born into. He knew that during his life in this world He would have to face the most terrible of temptations. He knew that He would have to battle against hell continuously, and face the disbelief of the people around Him. His first thirty-three years were a preparation for this work lying before Him. And so He chose to be born to a couple who were in a state of order, who because of that order, were willing to receive Him into their lives, to nurture Him as if He was their own.

There is a message in this for us. Each one of us wants the Lord to be born into our own lives, and He is willing to come to us. "Behold,' He says, 'I stand at the door and knock'. Yet He can only enter into us to the degree that we bring our lives into order. Mary and Joseph clung to their betrothal - they committed themselves and stood fast. That is what the Lord wants us to do: to commit ourselves to Him, to live according to His Word in every detail of our lives, especially in our relationships with others, in our preparation for marriage, and in our marriages themselves. As we do, then He enters into us, establishes His presence there, and lifts us up to heaven.

AMEN

Lessons:

Deuteronomy 22:25-29

Isaiah 7:14-16

Luke 1:26-38

Conjugial Love 302

852. Having his Father's name written in their foreheads. That this signifies these truths, according to the acknowledgment of His Divine from love, is evident from the signification of His Father's name, as denoting the Lord's Divine, of which we shall speak presently; and from the signification of being written in their foreheads as denoting a full acknowledgment.

The reason why the Father's name written in their foreheads denotes the full acknowledgment of the Lord's Divine is, that the Lord turns all who acknowledge His Divine to Himself, and looks at them in their foreheads, and they on the other hand look at the Lord with their eyes; and this because the forehead signifies love, and the eye the understanding of truth. Hence by their being looked at by the Lord in their foreheads, is signified that the Lord beholds them from the good of love; and by their looking at the Lord, on their part, with the eyes, is signified that they [look to the Lord] from truths from that good, consequently from the understanding of truth. That all those who are in the heavens are turned to the Lord, and with the face look unto Him as the Sun, may be seen above (n. 646) and in the work concerning Heaven and Hell 17, 123, 142, 272). Also that the Lord looks at the angels in the forehead, and that the angels on the other hand see the Lord with the eyes, because the forehead corresponds to the good of love, and the eyes correspond to the understanding of truth, see the same work (n. 145, 251). And that the forehead corresponds to the good of love (see also above, n. 427).

[2] He who does not know the nature of the Word in the literal sense, may suppose that where mention is made of God and the Lamb, and, in the present case, of the Lamb and the Father, two are meant; when, nevertheless, the Lord alone is meant by both. The same is meant in the Word of the Old Testament; where mention is made of Jehovah, the Lord Jehovih, Jehovah Zebaoth, Lord, Jehovah God, God in the plural and the singular, the God of Israel, the Holy one of Israel, the King of Israel, Creator, Saviour, Redeemer, Schaddai, Rock, and so on, a similar opinion may be entertained; when, nevertheless, by all these names are not meant several, but one; for the Lord is thus variously named according to His Divine attributes.

The case is the same with the Word of the New Testament, where Father, Son, and Holy Spirit are mentioned as three, when yet by these three names one is meant; for by the Father is meant the Lord as to the Divine itself, which was His soul from the Father; by the Son is meant the Divine Human; and by the Holy Spirit, the proceeding Divine. Thus the three are one; similarly here by the Lamb and the Father one, and not two, is meant.

[3] That the Lord, when He spoke of the Father, meant the Divine in Himself, and thus Himself, is evident from many passages in the Word of both Testaments. But here I will only adduce some from the Word of the Evangelists, from which it can be seen, that the Lord by the Father meant the Divine in Himself, which was in Him as the soul is in the body; and that when He named the Father and Himself as two, He meant Himself by both. For the soul and body are one, the soul belonging to its own body, and the body to its own soul. Thus the Divine, which is called the Father, was the very Divine of the Lord, from which His Human existed, and from which it became Divine, is quite clear from His conception from the Divine itself; as in Matthew:

"The angel of the Lord appeared" to Joseph "in a dream, saying, Fear not to take unto thee Mary thy spouse, for that which is begotten in her is of the Holy Spirit; and Joseph knew her not, until she brought forth her first-born Son" (1:20, 25).

And in Luke:

The angel said unto Mary, "Behold, thou shalt conceive in thy womb, and bring forth a Son, and shalt call his name Jesus. He shall be great, and shall be called the Son of the Most High. But Mary said unto the angel, How shall this come to pass, seeing I know not a man? And the angel answered and said, The Holy Spirit shall come upon thee, and the power of the Most High shall overshadow thee: therefore that Holy Thing which shall be born of thee shall be called the Son of God" (1:31, 34, 35).

From this it is clear that the Lord from conception is Jehovah God; and to be Jehovah God from conception is to be so as to life itself, which is called the soul from the Father, from which the body possesses life. From this also it is quite clear, that the Lord's Human is what is called the Son of God, for it is said "the Holy Thing" which shall be born of thee, shall be called the Son of God.

[4] That it is the Lord's Human which is called the Son of God, is further evident from the Word of both the Old and New Testaments in various passages. But upon this subject, God willing, more shall be said specifically elsewhere. Only the following passages will be quoted here that testify that the Lord, by the Father, meant the Divine in Himself, consequently Himself.

In John:

"In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and God was the Word: all things were made through him, and without him was not any thing made that was made. And the Word was made flesh and dwelt among us, and we beheld his glory as the glory of the Only-Begotten of the Father, full of grace and truth" (1:1, 2, 14).

That by the Word is meant the Lord as to the Divine Human is clear; for it is said that "the Word was made flesh, and we beheld His glory, as the glory of the Only-Begotten of the Father." That the Lord is God also as to the Human, or that the Lord's Human is also Divine, is also clear; for it is said, "the Word was with God, and God was the Word," and this Word was made flesh.

[5] By the Word is meant the Lord as to the Divine truth.

In the same:

"My Father worketh hitherto, therefore also I work: but the Jews sought to kill him, because he said that God was his own Father, making himself equal with God. But Jesus answered, and said, The Son can do nothing of himself, but what he seeth the Father doing: for what things soever he doeth, these also doeth the Son likewise. As the Father raiseth up the dead, and quickeneth them, even so the Son quickeneth whom he will. He that honoureth not the Son, honoureth not the Father which sent him. Verily, I say unto you, The hour is coming, when the dead shall hear the voice of the Son of God: and they that hear shall live. For as the Father hath life in himself, so hath he given to the Son to have life in himself" (John 5:17-28).

[6] That by the Father is here meant the Divine in the Lord, which was His life, just as the soul of the father is the life in every man; and that by the Son is meant the Human, which had life from the very Divine itself which was in Him, and thence also was made Divine; consequently that the Father and the Son are one, is plain from the Lord's words in the above passages - that the Son doeth the same things as the Father; that the Son raiseth the dead and quickens them as the Father; that the Son has life in Himself as the Father; and that they shall live who hear the voice of the Son. From these things it is quite clear that the Father and the Son are one as soul and body. Moreover, the same is evident from the Jews seeking to kill Him, because He said that God was His own Father, making Himself equal with God.

[7] In the same:

"All that the Father giveth me shall come unto me; every one who hath heard and learned of the Father, cometh unto me. Not that any one hath seen the Father, save he who is with the Father; he seeth the Father. I am the living bread, which came down from heaven; even as the Father who hath sent me liveth, I also live by the Father" (6:37, and following verses).

The Lord there says of His Human, that it came down from heaven, and that every one has life through Him, because the Father and He are one; and that the life of the Father is in Him, as the soul is from the father in the son.

In the same:

"I give eternal life" to my sheep, "and they shall never perish, neither shall any pluck them out of my Father's hand. I and the Father are one." The Jews were enraged because he made himself God. "And he said, Say ye of him whom the Father hath sanctified, and sent into the world, Thou blasphemest, because I said, I am the Son of God? If I do not the works of my Father, believe me not; but if I do, believe the works, that ye may know and believe that the Father is in me, and I in the Father" (10:28-38).

Here the Lord speaks of the Father as of another, saying, "No one shall pluck the sheep out of my Father's hand"; also, "if I do not the works of my Father, believe me not, but if I do, believe the works"; and yet, lest they should believe that the Father and He were two, He saith, "the Father and I are one"; and lest they should believe that they were one only by love, He adds, "that ye may know and believe that the Father is in me, and I in the Father." It is therefore evident that the Lord by the Father meant Himself, or the Divine in Himself from conception; and that by the Son, whom the Father sent, He meant His Human. For this was sent into the world by being conceived of God the Father and born of a virgin.

[8] In the same:

"Jesus cried and said, he who believeth in me, believeth not in me, but in him that sent me; and he that seeth me, seeth him that sent me. I am come a light into the world, that whosoever believeth on me, should not abide in the darkness" (12:44-46).

That the Lord by the Father meant Himself, and by the Son His Divine Human, whom the Father sent, is also clear from these words; for He says, "He who seeth me, seeth him that sent me," also "He that believeth in me, believeth not in me, but in him that sent me"; and yet He says that they are to believe in Him (verse 36, and elsewhere).

[9] In the same:

"Jesus, knowing that the Father had given all things into his hand, and that he came forth from God, and returned to God, said, He who receiveth me, receiveth him that sent me" (13:3, 20).

Because the Father and He were one, and the Human of the Lord was Divine from the Divine in Him, therefore all things of the Father were His; which is meant by the Father giving all things into His hands; and because they were one, He says, "He that receiveth me, receiveth him that sent me." By going out from the Father and returning to the Father, is meant to be conceived and thereby exist from Him, and to be united to Him, as the soul to the body.

[10] In the same:

"I am the way, the truth, and the life: no man cometh to the Father but by me. If ye had known me, ye would have known my Father also: and from henceforth ye know him, and have seen him. Philip saith unto him, Lord, show us the Father. Jesus saith unto him, have I been so long time with you, and dost thou not know me, Philip? He that hath seen me hath seen the Father: and how sayest thou then, Show us the Father? Believest thou not that I am in the Father, and the Father in me? the Father that dwelleth in me, he doeth the works. Believe me, that I am in the Father and the Father in me" (14:6-11).

Here it is plainly said that the Father and He are one, and that the union is like that of soul and body; consequently that it is such a union that he who seeth Him seeth the Father. This union is further confirmed in that chapter. And because such was the union, and no one can come to man's soul, but only to the man himself, therefore the Lord says, that

They should approach him, and ask the Father in his name, and that he would give to them (John 16:23, 24).

[11] This union is also meant by

His going forth from the Father and coming into the world; and again leaving the world, and going to the Father (John 16:5, 10, 16, 17, 28).

Because the Father and He were one, therefore He also says:

"All things whatsoever the Father hath are mine," and that therefore the Paraclete, which is the Holy Spirit, shall receive from the Lord what he should speak (John 16:13-15).

In another place:

Father, thou hast given me power over all flesh, that to every one whom thou hast given me, I might give eternal life. "This is life eternal, that they may know thee, the only true God, and Jesus Christ whom thou hast sent. All things that are mine are thine, and all things that are thine are mine" (John 17:2, 3, 10).

Here also it is openly declared, that all things belonging to the Father are His, as all things of the soul are man's; for man and the soul are one, as the life and the subject of life. That the Lord is God also as to the Human, is clear from these words of the Lord, "That they may know thee, the only God, and Jesus Christ whom thou hast sent."

[12] Because the Father and the Son of God are one, therefore the Lord says:

That when he cometh to judgment, "He will come in the glory of his Father" (Mark 8:38; Luke 9:26); and "in His own glory" (Matthew 25:31) and that "He hath all power in the heavens and on earth" (Matthew 28:18).

That by the Son of God is meant the Lord's Divine Human, is also evident in other passages in the Word of the New Testament; and also in the Old Testament.

As in Isaiah:

"Unto us a Child is born, unto us a Son is given, and the government shall be upon his shoulder, and his name shall be called Wonderful, Counsellor, God, Hero, the Father of Eternity, the Prince of Peace" (9:6).

And in the same prophet:

"A virgin shall conceive and bring forth a Son, and his name shall be called God with us" (7:14).

That by the child born, and the son given, is here meant the Lord as to the Divine Human, is clear; and that the Lord as to it, also, is God. Thus that His Human is Divine, is manifestly declared; for it is said that "His name shall be called God," "God with us," "The Father of Eternity."

Besides these passages, many others might also be quoted to prove that the Lord, by the Father, in the Word, meant His own Divine, which was the life or soul of His Human, and not another separate from Himself. Nor could He mean another. Hence the Divine and the Human in the Lord - according to the doctrine of the Christian world - are not two but one Person, altogether as soul and body; as is expressed in clear terms in the Athanasian Creed. And because God and Man in the Lord are not two but one person, and united like soul and body, it follows that the Divine, which the Lord had from conception, was what He called Father; and the Divine Human was that which He called Son; consequently that each was Himself.

From these things it is evident, that by the name of the Father written in their forehead, is meant the Lord as to His Divine.