The Betrothal

A Christmas Doctrinal Class by Rev. Andrew M.T. Dibb

Now in the sixth month the angel Gabriel was sent by God to a city of Galilee named Nazareth, to a virgin betrothed to a man whose name was Joseph, of the house of David. The virgin's name was Mary. (Luke 1:26-27)

So begins the wonderful story of the Lord's conception in the Gospel of Luke. The scene is familiar to each of us: Mary is at home, when suddenly she sees the angel Gabriel and hears his words of great joy:

"Rejoice, highly favoured one, the Lord is with you; blessed are you among women!" (Luke 1:28)

An angel is a messenger of the Lord. In the Word angels came to bring wisdom and comfort, hope and the good news, the “euangellion” or Gospel, to those to whom the Lord wanted His presence revealed. This Gospel is the teaching that the Lord Jesus Christ was born into this world, that He made it possible for all people to be saved and brought into His kingdom. Thus the angel Gabriel came in excitement to Mary to inform her that she was the Lord’s choice as His natural mother.

When Mary saw the angel Gabriel, she didn't know that he was the human form of an entire society of angels. Nor did she know that his greatest love is to tell people about the Lord, especially that He would be born into the world to save the human race from spiritual bondage.

The scene of the angel Gabriel announcing to Mary that she would conceive and bear a son, and call His name Jesus, is one of the most poignant in the Word. Mary was a simple person, living in Galilee far away from the centre of worship at Jerusalem. She was neither highly educated nor socially well connected, except that she descended from Israel’s greatest king, David. There is a beautiful innocence in Mary’s simplicity. The last thing she expected in life was to see an angel. The image we have of Mary is of a demure young maiden, a virgin in every sense, for, as she said to the angel, 'I do not know a man'. Her state of life was that of a young woman about to embark on her married life to Joseph, but still living at home with her parents. The marriage had not yet been celebrated.

It is central to the Christmas story that Mary was betrothed to Joseph when the angel Gabriel appeared to her. This fact is mentioned in the lesson we read in the Gospel of Luke, where it is plainly stated that she was a 'virgin betrothed'. In Matthew we are again told that Mary was 'betrothed to Joseph'. This means that she had been promised as a wife to Joseph. In our culture, we would say that they were engaged to be married.

There are several good reasons why Mary should have been in this state when she conceived the Lord:

- In the Jewish Church of that time betrothal was considered marriage, although the marriage had not yet been consummated. This meant that the people around her considered Mary a woman, and it also meant that her mind was focusing on the upcoming marriage and future life as a wife and a mother.

- She was expected, during this period of betrothal, to remain in a state of order. She was not free to come into romantic contact with any other man, and she certainly was not permitted to have sexual intercourse with any man, including her husband to be.

The angel appeared to her in this state precisely for that reason - the child who was to be conceived needed to be conceived in a state of virginity, and there could be no question down the ages that Jesus was the son of an ordinary man. This is why Mary protested that she could not conceive because she 'had not known a man'.

There is a very good reason for this: the doctrines tell us that the human soul is transmitted as the living principle of the masculine seed. That soul, or internal human is passed from father to child, is an image of the father's own soul - although the life in it is from the Divine Itself. When a child is conceived, that human soul can receive life from the Lord, and, using the life in it, begins to draw from the mother the various substances needed to form the human body. When the child is born, he or she becomes an individual, drawing life from the Lord, and potential spiritual things from both mother and father, and the body from the mother. Thus there is a complete mixing of parents in the birth of a child.

When the angel Gabriel came to Mary, he announced the birth of the Lord. It was to be a miracle of all miracles, for according to prophecy a virgin would conceive and bear a son. He was conceived of the Holy Spirit. His soul was Divine, given to Him by the Father, or, put another way, the soul within Jesus was not limited and finite as our souls are, but infinite and eternal, and capable of overcoming the powers of hell and saving the human race.

Here's an excerpt from Swedenborg's work, Arcana Coelestia 1999: "But the Lord's Internal was Jehovah Himself, since He was conceived from Jehovah, who cannot be divided or become the relative of another, like a son who has been conceived from a human father. For unlike the human, the Divine is not capable of being divided but is and remains one and the same. To this Internal the Lord united the Human Essence. Moreover because the Lord's Internal was Jehovah it was not, like man's internal, a recipient form of life, but life itself. Through that union His Human Essence as well became life itself. Hence the Lord's frequent declaration that He is Life, as in John,

As the Father has Life in Himself, so He has granted the Son to have Life in Himself. John 5:26."

Yet even a soul such as that, if it is to live and walk amongst the people of this earth, must be clothed in a body. The Lord always operates within the boundaries of the order of creation - and order dictates that a soul must be clothed with a material body.

At first the father’s soul is clothed with human elements, for it begins as a reproduction of the father’s own soul, then,

"during its descent, … the soul is enveloped by elements of a type that have to do with the father's natural love. This is the source from which hereditary evil springs." (Conjugial Love 245)

And so the Lord needed an orderly environment in which to be born. Mary was chosen as His mother because, according to the Lord's all-seeing wisdom, He saw that she would be willing to carry this child, and she would be able to nurture Him in such a way that He would grow up prepared for the great work ahead of Him.

Yet Mary had to be in a state of order herself. In ancient Israel, to bear a child meant that she had to be married, and yet to preserve the honesty of the conception and ensure that the soul was Divine, not human, she had to be in the state before actual physical union with Joseph had taken place - otherwise the Lord could have been Joseph's son. So she had to be betrothed, and no motive should be found as a basis for accusations against the Virgin Birth.

It was partly for this reason that when Joseph heard that she was carrying a child he decided to put her away. Effectively this meant he planned to divorce her. According to the law of Moses, a betrothed woman carrying a child had broken the rules. Ideally speaking, the man responsible should be put to death. Joseph had no idea who the man was, but assumed that there was one. He was, however, a kind man, and so decided not 'to make her a public example', but to put her away privately.

It was at this juncture that the angel Gabriel came to Joseph in a dream, and soothed his fears. 'The child she is carrying,' the angel said, 'is conceived by the Holy Spirit.' Now Joseph understood, and the state of betrothal could continue, and order could be maintained so that the Lord could be born into this world with the full appearance of two loving parents, bound together in marriage after an orderly betrothal.

We now need to expand our vision of the Lord's life in this world. The conception of the Lord was but the first step in his development. He had to be born and grow up. His mind and body had to develop as does our own. The home of Mary and Joseph was needed to provide a stable and orderly environment for Him where He could live and grow, undergoing not only physical and mental development, but also the very processes by which His Divine soul could become present within His natural mind.

In picking these two people to be his 'parents' in the natural world, the Lord was able to provide for the future as well. The Word does not tell us anything about the marriage relationship between Joseph and Mary. We know that Joseph was obedient to the angel when he was told to take Mary and the infant Lord down to Egypt to escape Herod's cruelty. We know that each year they travelled to Jerusalem to celebrate the Passover. We know that had other children, whom likewise they loved and nurtured. But that is about all we know.

The book, Conjugial Love, by Emanuel Swedenborg, however, gives us some insights into the kind of orderly relationship they had. They begin in the concept of Betrothal, for betrothal is introductory to marriage. The kinds of preparation people make for their marriages determine a great deal the course their marriage will follow. The fact that Mary in her betrothed state had 'not known a man' indicates that she took the responsibilities of that state serious. Similarly, the fact that Joseph immediately knew that he was not the father of the child Mary carried indicates a similar seriousness about the state of betrothal. They were both innocent of any wrongdoing, and were obviously committed to building a life together based on the firm foundation of proper preparation.

Their betrothal prepared them for their future life together as man and wife, and, thus as the Lord's parents on earth. Betrothal is a preparation for marriage. It is a time when the minds and spirits of the two partners begin to grow together.

The teachings of the New Church tell us that true marriage, or conjugial love as it is often called, is a meeting and union of two minds. A true marriage is one in which the couple recognises the essential differences between masculinity and femininity, and rejoices in those differences without any attempt to dominate the other. In order for a couple to come into a true appreciation of each other, they need to put aside physical love to foster and nurture spiritual love. This is why Mary and Joseph lived apart during this stage of their relationship, and why they refrained from sexual activity, for in that way they made it possible for their minds to soar, and be united at the highest levels of idealism.

The book Conjugial Love tells us that in this state the mind of each partner is opened by his or her spiritual love. They are able to reach higher levels of love and commitment to each other as they foster the growth of mutual understanding unencumbered by physical things. The passage describing this development, then, goes on to describe how when a couple marry their love descends from the mind to the body. It is worth reflecting on the statement that

"It needs to be known that the quality of conjugial love as it comes down is determined by the height to which it climbs. If it reaches the heights it comes down chaste, but if it does not, it comes down as unchaste." (Conjugial Love 302).

With Mary and Joseph we can but only assume that their love reached its heights during their betrothal, and that their marriage was one of purity and chastity. Chastity in this sense means a marriage love between two people that has been cleansed of all impurities. In such a state the husband and wife enjoy the full pleasures of marriage, beginning on the spiritual level with a full meeting of minds, and descends into the body, where their love is consummated.

A marriage of this kind provides the most wonderful environment, for the love between the husband and wife provides a state of tranquillity and peace in which children can be reared. This is the kind of environment the Lord chose to be born into. He knew that during his life in this world He would have to face the most terrible of temptations. He knew that He would have to battle against hell continuously, and face the disbelief of the people around Him. His first thirty-three years were a preparation for this work lying before Him. And so He chose to be born to a couple who were in a state of order, who because of that order, were willing to receive Him into their lives, to nurture Him as if He was their own.

There is a message in this for us. Each one of us wants the Lord to be born into our own lives, and He is willing to come to us. "Behold,' He says, 'I stand at the door and knock'. Yet He can only enter into us to the degree that we bring our lives into order. Mary and Joseph clung to their betrothal - they committed themselves and stood fast. That is what the Lord wants us to do: to commit ourselves to Him, to live according to His Word in every detail of our lives, especially in our relationships with others, in our preparation for marriage, and in our marriages themselves. As we do, then He enters into us, establishes His presence there, and lifts us up to heaven.

AMEN

Lessons:

Deuteronomy 22:25-29

Isaiah 7:14-16

Luke 1:26-38

Conjugial Love 302

349. And the four-and-twenty elders fell down and worshipped him that liveth unto ages of ages. That this signifies humiliation and acknowledgment from the heart of all those who are in truths from good, that the Lord alone liveth, and that from Him alone is life eternal, is clear from the signification of four-and-twenty elders, as denoting all those who are in truths from good (concerning which see above, n. [270] ¹ ); from the signification of falling, down and worshipping, as denoting humiliation and acknowledgment from the heart, that all good and truth that have life in themselves, are from the Lord (concerning which also see above, n. 290, 291); and from the signification of Him that liveth, when said of the Lord, as denoting that He alone lives, and that from Him is life eternal (concerning which also see above, n. 82, 84, 186, 289, 291).

[2] Since it is at this day believed in the world, that the life which every one has, is given and implanted, and is thus his own, and that it does not flow in continually, I wish to say something respecting it. That it is believed that life is in man so as to be man's, is only an appearance arising from the perpetual presence of the Lord, and from His Divine love, willing to be conjoined with man, to be in him, and impart to him its own life, for such is the nature of the Divine love; and because this is perpetual and continuous, man supposes that the life thus in him is his own; notwithstanding it is known that there is no good and truth in man that does not come from above, and thus flow in. Similarly love and faith; for the whole of man's love is from good, and the whole of his faith is from truth; for what a man loves is to him good, and what he believes is to him truth. Hence it is in the first place evident, that no good and no truth, so neither love nor faith, is in man, but that they flow in from the Lord, life itself being in good and truth, and not elsewhere. The receptacle of the good of love with man is the will, and the receptacle of the truth of faith with him is the understanding; and to will good is not of man, neither to believe truth. These two faculties are those in which all the life of man is, outside of them there is none; hence also it is evident that the life of those faculties, consequently, the life of the whole man, is not in man, but flows in. That evil and falsity, or the will and the love of evil, and the understanding and the faith of falsity, are with man, is also from influx; but that influx is from hell. For man is kept in the freedom of choosing, that is, of receiving good and truth from the Lord, or of receiving evil and falsity from hell, and man is kept in this for the sake of reformation, for he is kept between heaven and hell, and hence in spiritual equilibrium, which is freedom. This freedom itself is not in the man, but it is together with the life which flows in. (Concerning the freedom of man, and its origin, see the work concerning Heaven and Hell 293, 537, 540, 541, 546, [589]-603 ² , and in the Doctrine of the New Jerusalem [n. 141-147].)

[3] Those who are in hell also live from the influx of life from the Lord, for good and truth similarly flow into them; but they turn the good into evil, and the truth into falsity; and this is done because they have inverted their interior recipient forms by a life of evil; and all influx is varied according to the forms. In the same way also man's thought and will [are varied] when they act in members distorted from the birth, or in injured organs of sensation. And similarly also the light of heaven when it flows into objects whose colours vary, and the heat of heaven when it flows into the same whose odours are varied, according to the interior receptive forms. But it should be known, that the life itself is not changed and varied, but that by means of it there is presented an appearance of the recipient form, through which and from which the life passes, nearly in the same manner as every one appears by the same light in a mirror according, to his own quality.

[4] Moreover, all man's senses, namely, sight, hearing, smell, taste, and touch, are not in the man, but are excited and produced from influx; in the man there are only organic receptive forms; these possess no sense until something adequate from without flows in. It is the same with the internal organs of sensation of the thought and affection, which receive influx from the spiritual world, as with the external organs of sensation that receive influx from the natural world. That there is one only fountain of life, and that all life is thence, and continually flows in, is well known in heaven, and is never called in question by any angel of the higher heavens, for they perceive the influx itself. That all lives are like streams from one only and perpetual fountain of life, has been also rendered evident to me from much experience, and has been seen in the spiritual world with those who believed that they lived from themselves, and would not believe that they lived from the Lord. These, when the influx into the thought was withheld from them as to some part, lay deprived of life, as it were, and presently on the influx approaching, they revived, as it were, from death; and they afterwards confessed that the life in them was not their own, but flowed continuously into them, and that men, spirits, and angels were only forms receptive of life.

[5] The wise, there, conclude that it is so from this fact, that nothing can exist and subsist from itself, but from what is prior to itself, and thence that neither can that which is prior exist from itself, save in successive order from a First; and thus life itself, viewed in itself, is only from Him, who alone is Life in Himself. Hence also they know, and likewise from a spiritual idea perceive, that everything must be in connection with a First in order that it may be something, and that it is something only as it is in such connection. From these considerations it is evident how foolishly they think who derive the origin of life from nature, and suppose that man learns to think through the influx of interior nature and its order, and not from God, who is the very Being (Esse) of life, and from whom is all the order of both worlds, - the natural and the spiritual, - according to which the life flows in, - life eternal into those who can be disposed to receive life according to Divine order, but an opposite life, which is called spiritual death, into those who cannot be so disposed, thus who live contrary to Divine order. The Divine good which proceeds from the Lord, is that from which order exists, and Divine truths are the laws of order. (As may be seen in the Doctrine of the New Jerusalem 279.)

[6] Let every one take heed lest he believe that the Divine Life with any one, even indeed with the evil and in hell, is changed; for, as said above, the life itself is not changed or varied, but by it an appearance of the receptive form is presented, through which and from which it passes; nearly in the same manner as every one appears in a mirror according to his own quality, by light, which still remains in its own state, and only produces the form to the sight; and as the same life presents itself to be felt according to the form of the organ of the body, thus after one manner in the eye, after another in the hearing, and otherwise in the smell, taste, and touch. If it is believed that the life is varied and changed, it is from the appearance, which is a fallacy like the fallacy from the appearance that influx is physical, whereas influx is spiritual. (Concerning this matter more may be seen in the work concerning Heaven and Hell 9; to which may be added what is adduced concerning the influx of life, in the Doctrine of the New Jerusalem from the Arcana Coelestia 277, 278; and concerning the influx of life with animals, in the Arcana Coelestia 5850, 6211; and in the work concerning Heaven and Hell 39, 108, 110, 435, 567; likewise in the small work concerning the Last Judgment 25.)

[7] These things are said in order that it may be known, that there is one only Life, and that whatever things live, live from it. It shall now be shown that the Lord is that Life itself, or that He alone lives, since this is signified by Him that liveth unto ages of ages. That there is one only Divine, and that this is not distinguished into three persons, according to the faith of Athanasius, is evident from what has been frequently said above, and especially from what will be specifically said upon this subject at the end of this work; and because the Lord's Divine, which is the one only Divine, assumed the Human, and made this also Divine, therefore each is the Life from which all live. That this is the case may be known from the words of the Lord Himself, in the following passages. In John:

"As the Father raiseth up the dead, and quickeneth them, so also the Son quickeneth whom he will. As the Father hath life in himself, so hath he given to the Son to have life in himself" (5:21, 26).

By the Father is here meant the Lord's very Divine which assumed the Human, for this Divine was in Him from conception, and because He was conceived from it, therefore He called this the Father, and not another. By the Son is meant the Lord's Divine Human; that this also is life itself, the Lord teaches in express words, by saying as the Father quickeneth, the Son also quickeneth whom He will; and, as the Father hath life in Himself, so hath He given to the Son to have life in Himself. To have life in Himself is to be Life itself; others however are not life, but have life thence.

[8] In the same:

"I am the way, the truth, and the life; no man cometh unto the Father, but by me" (14:6).

I am the Way, the Truth, and the Life, are spoken of the Lord's Human; for He also says, "No one cometh unto the Father, but by me," His Father being the Divine in Him, which was His own Divine; whence it is evident, that the Lord also as to His Human is the Life, consequently, that it also is Divine.

[9] In the same:

"Jesus said, I am the resurrection, and the life; he that believeth in me, though he were dead, yet shall he live. He that liveth and believeth in me shall never die" (11:25, 26).

These words also the Lord spake concerning His Human; and because He is Life, and all have life from Him, and those who believe in Him have life eternal, therefore He says that "He is the resurrection and the life," and that "he who believeth in me shall never die." By believing in the Lord is signified to be conjoined with Him in love and faith; and by never dying is signified not to die spiritually, that is, to be damned, for the life of the damned is called death.

[10] In the same:

"In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. In him was life; and the life was the light of men. And the Word was made flesh, and dwelt among us" (1:1, 4, 14).

That by the Word is meant the Lord, is known; that His Human is the Word, is evident, for it is said that the Word was made flesh, and dwelt among us; and that His Human was equally Divine with the Divine itself which assumed the Human, is evident from this circumstance, that a distinction is made between them, and that each is called God, for it is said, "the Word was with God, and the Word was God; and in him was life." That all live from Him is meant by, the life was the light of men. The light of men is the life of their thought and understanding; for the proceeding Divine, which is specifically meant by the Word, appears in heaven as the light by which the angels not only see, but also think and understand, and are wise according to its reception (see the work concerning Heaven and Hell 126-140). This, the light proceeding from the Lord, is life itself, which not only enlightens the understanding, as the sun of the world does the eye, but also vivifies it according to reception; and when that light is received in the life, it is then called the light of life. In the same:

"Jesus said, I am the light of the world; he that followeth me shall not walk in darkness, but shall have the light of life" (8:12).

[11] And He is also called, in the same, the Bread of life.

"The bread of God is he who cometh down from heaven, and giveth life unto the world. I am the Bread of life" (6:33, 35, 47, 48, 51).

The Bread of God and the Bread of life is that from which all have life. Since life, which is called intelligence and wisdom, is from the Lord, it follows also that life in general is from Him; for the particulars of life which make its perfection, and are insinuated into man according to reception, are all things of the general life. It is perfected in proportion as the evils into which man is born are removed from it.

[12] That those who are conjoined with the Lord by love and faith receive life eternal, that is, the life of heaven, which is salvation, is evident from the following passages. In John:

"I am the Vine, ye are the branches; he that abideth in me, and I in him, the same bringeth forth much fruit; for without me ye can do nothing. If a man abide not in me, he is cast forth, and as a branch he is withered" (15:5, 6).

In the same:

"Every one who believeth on me, hath life everlasting (3:14-16).

In the same:

"He that believeth on the Son, hath life everlasting; but he that believeth not the Son, shall not see life, but the wrath of God abideth on him" (3:36).

"Whoever believeth on the Son, hath life eternal, and I will raise him up at the last day" (6:40, 47, 48 ³ ).

In the same:

"The sheep follow me; and I give unto them eternal life; and they shall never perish" (10:27, 28).

And in the same:

"Search the Scriptures; they testify of me; but ye will not come unto me, that ye may have life" (5:39, 40).

Mention is made in the Word of believing in God, and of believing the things which are from God; and to believe in God is the faith which saves, but to believe the things that are from God is an historical faith, which without the former does not save, and therefore, is not true faith; for to believe in God is to know, to will, and to do; but to believe the things that are from God, is to know, which is possible without willing and doing. Those who are truly Christians know, will, and do; but those who are not truly Christians, only know; but the latter are called by the Lord foolish, and the former wise (Matthew 7:24, 26).

Footnotes: