209. UNIVERSAL MATTERS RELATING TO MARRIAGES

There are very many points in regard to marriage which, if presented in detail, would swell this book into an immense volume. For we could present a detailed treatment of various particulars relating to similarities and dissimilarities between partners; to the elevation of natural conjugial love into spiritual conjugial love, and the conjunction of the two; to the gradual growth of the one and the gradual decline of the other; to the varieties and diversities in each; to the intelligence in wives; to the universal conjugial atmosphere emanating from heaven, and the one opposite to it from hell; to the way these flow in and are received; and many other topics besides, which, if they were set out point by point, would expand this work into so large a tome it would weary the reader.

For this reason, and to avoid useless prolixities, we consolidate these items into this chapter on "Universal Matters Relating to Marriages." As in previous chapters, however, we will divide them into discussions under their own headings, as follows:

1. The special sense of conjugial love is the sense of touch.

2. In the case of people who are in a state of truly conjugial love, their capacity for growing wise increases, but with those who are not in a state of conjugial love, it decreases.

3. In the case of people who are in a state of truly conjugial love, their happiness in living together increases, but with those who are not in a state of conjugial love, it decreases.

4. In the case of people who are in a state of truly conjugial love, their union of minds increases, and with it, their friendship, but with those who are not in a state of conjugial love, these both decrease.

5. People who are in a state of truly conjugial love continually wish to be one person, but those who are not in a state of conjugial love want to be two separate individuals.

6. People who are in a state of truly conjugial love look to eternity in their marriage, while the opposite is the case with those who are not in a state of conjugial love.

7. Conjugial love has its seat in chaste wives, but still their love depends on their husbands.

8. Wives love the bonds of marriage, provided that their husbands love them too.

9. The intelligence of women is by nature modest, gracious, peaceable, compliant, soft and gentle, whereas the intelligence of men is by nature critical, rough, resistant, argumentative, and given to intemperance.

10. Wives do not experience a state of arousal as their husbands do, but theirs is a state of readiness to receive.

11. The sexual abundance men have is according to their love of propagating the truths of their wisdom and according to their love of performing useful services.

12. Determinations to intercourse are at the good pleasure of the husband.

13. There is a conjugial atmosphere which flows in from the Lord through heaven into each and every thing of the universe, extending even to its lowest forms.

14. This atmosphere is received by the female sex and communicated through it to the male sex, and not the other way around.

15. Where a truly conjugial love exists, this atmosphere is received by the wife, and by the husband solely through his wife.

16. Where the love is not conjugial, this atmosphere is indeed received by the wife, but not by the husband through her.

17. Truly conjugial love can be present in one of the partners and not at the same time in the other.

18. Married partners bring with them [various similarities and] ¹ various dissimilarities, both internal and external.

19. Various similar qualities can be joined together, but not with dissimilar ones.

20. For people who desire truly conjugial love, the Lord provides a similar partner, and if one is not found on earth, He provides one in heaven.

21. To the degree that a person's conjugial love wanes and is lost, his character approaches that of an animal.

Explanation of these statements now follows.

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