2. FIRST INDEX.

ADULTERIES (Adulteria). (See also LASCIVIOUSNESS.)

Concerning the three degrees of adulteries (386-388) [Conjugial Love 432, 485-499]. (see DEGREES.)

Concerning adulterers seen as satyrs, in company with harlots, in a wood, and in a cavern there; and afterwards in a house, where they were conversing together about marriage, nature, and religion (Memorabilia 407) [Conjugial Love 521].

They who have no religion have not conjugial love; but lust which is worse than the lust of a wild beast (439-445) [Conjugial Love 79, 239, 240].

Of the closure of the mind with adulterers and the evil (various things, 562-565) [Conjugial Love 203].

Conjugial similitude and dissimilitude are not regarded with those who are in scortatory love (818-822).

Conjugial love and scortatory love are altogether opposite to each other (847-851) [Conjugial Love 423-429].

Concerning a young man who boasted of his whoredom; he was conducted into heaven; he was held by turns in externals and internals; and thus he saw opposite things (Memorabilia 852) [Conjugial Love 477].

An internal cause of coldness between consorts is, that the evil of whoredom is not believed to be sin; still more, if it is confirmed that it is not sin (913-917) [Conjugial Love 240].

A cause of coldness is, whoredom before marriage with the wives of others; also meretricious love and concubinage after marriage: in general, all libidinousness by which the conjugial perishes (918-928).

A cause of coldness between consorts is, that conjugial love is believed to be one with scortatory love (958-961) [Conjugial Love 247].

Whoredom is the genuine cause of divorce (985-993) [Conjugial Love 255].

Adulterers do not acknowledge God (Memorabilia 1300) [Conjugial Love 500].

Whoredoms in general correspond to falsifications of truth and profanations of good, by means of the Word (1399-1403) [Conjugial Love 77, 80, 517, 518].

Heinous adulteries within the prohibited degrees correspond to certain heresies confirmed by the Word (1405-1407) [Conjugial Love 519].

The internal and spiritual cause of conjugial love is to shun adulteries from religion (1602-1606) [Conjugial Love 147-149].

An external or natural cause of love and friendship between consorts, is abstinence from whoredom from any cause, excepting impotence only (1611-1614).

Concerning angels of innocence, who did not understand what scortatory love is (Memorabilia 1738) [Conjugial Love 444].

Concerning fornication (see FORNICATION, MISTRESS).

There are several kinds of adulteries; there are those that are mild, those that are grievous, and those that are most grievous (1876) [Conjugial Love 479, 487, 491, 493].

Simple adultery is that of an unmarried man with the wife of another, or of an unmarried woman with another's husband (1877-1879) [Conjugial Love 480].

It can be seen from reason that adultery is unjust (various things, 1778) [Conjugial Love 481].

Duplicate adultery is the adultery of a husband with the wife of another, or of a wife with another's husband (1880-1885) [Conjugial Love 482].

With whom there is such adultery (carious things, 1882) [Conjugial Love 483].

There is such in England (1883) [Conjugial Love 483].

Triplicate adultery is with blood-relations (1884, 1885) [Conjugial Love 484].

There are adulteries of will, and there are adulteries of deed; and adulteries of the will in themselves are like those that are actual when opportunity offers and various fears do not prevent (1886, 1887) [Conjugial Love 490].

There are actual adulteries which are of the will, and there are adulteries which are not thus of the will; the latter are mild, but the former grievous (1889-1892) [Conjugial Love 486, 491-494].

Causes that certain adulteries are not committed in man's interior will (1892) [Conjugial Love 486].

Adulteries that are actual and of the will make man natural, sensual, and corporeal, as to the will, its inclinations and affections (1894-1896) [Conjugial Love 495, 496].

Their effect is, that man does not acknowledge God, the Divinity of the Lord, the holiness of the Word, and consequently the other things that belong to the church and to religion (1897-1903) [Conjugial Love 497].

Adulterers have the capacity to understand, equally with those who are not adulterers; but they abuse their rationality to confirm their adulteries (1904-1908) [Conjugial Love 498, 499].

How adulterers converse in favor of adulteries and against marriages (1908) [Conjugial Love 500].

The opposition of conjugial love and scortatory love (1910-1947) [Conjugial Love 423-443].

Scortatory love is opposite to celestial love, because scortatory love is infernal, and conjugial love is heavenly (1911-1914) [Conjugial Love 429].

Scortatory love is in the enjoyment of evil and falsity, but conjugial love in the enjoyment of good and truth (1915-1919) [Conjugial Love 427].

The uncleanness of hell is from scortatory love, and the cleanness of heaven is from conjugial love (1920-1924) [Conjugial Love 430].

So with what is unclean and what is clean, in the church (1925-1931) [Conjugial Love 431].

Scortatory love begins from the flesh, but conjugial love from the spirit (1932-1938) [Conjugial Love 440, 441].

Scortatory love makes a man (homo) not man; yea, the man not a man: but conjugial love makes a man (vir) more and more a man; yea, the man more and more a man (1939-1942) [Conjugial Love 432, 433].

The delights of scortatory love are pleasures of insanity, and the delights of conjugial love are enjoyments of wisdom (1943-1947) [Conjugial Love 442, 443].

Correspondence of whoredoms and adulteries with the violation of spiritual marriage, which is that of good and truth (1950-2000) [Conjugial Love 515-520]. (See CORRESPONDENCE.)

Adulteries are infernal (various things, 1999) [Conjugial Love 356, 477, 483]. (See CORRESPONDENCE.)

Some things respecting adulterers and adulteries in hell (2000) [Conjugial Love 500, 520].

Concerning those who lived after the four ancient ages; they were whoremongers and adulterers (Memorabilia 2034) [Conjugial Love 79, 80].

Concerning the hells of adulterers, in the west; where they appear like lakes of fire and brimstone (Memorabilia 2035) [Conjugial Love 79, 80].

209. UNIVERSAL MATTERS RELATING TO MARRIAGES

There are very many points in regard to marriage which, if presented in detail, would swell this book into an immense volume. For we could present a detailed treatment of various particulars relating to similarities and dissimilarities between partners; to the elevation of natural conjugial love into spiritual conjugial love, and the conjunction of the two; to the gradual growth of the one and the gradual decline of the other; to the varieties and diversities in each; to the intelligence in wives; to the universal conjugial atmosphere emanating from heaven, and the one opposite to it from hell; to the way these flow in and are received; and many other topics besides, which, if they were set out point by point, would expand this work into so large a tome it would weary the reader.

For this reason, and to avoid useless prolixities, we consolidate these items into this chapter on "Universal Matters Relating to Marriages." As in previous chapters, however, we will divide them into discussions under their own headings, as follows:

1. The special sense of conjugial love is the sense of touch.

2. In the case of people who are in a state of truly conjugial love, their capacity for growing wise increases, but with those who are not in a state of conjugial love, it decreases.

3. In the case of people who are in a state of truly conjugial love, their happiness in living together increases, but with those who are not in a state of conjugial love, it decreases.

4. In the case of people who are in a state of truly conjugial love, their union of minds increases, and with it, their friendship, but with those who are not in a state of conjugial love, these both decrease.

5. People who are in a state of truly conjugial love continually wish to be one person, but those who are not in a state of conjugial love want to be two separate individuals.

6. People who are in a state of truly conjugial love look to eternity in their marriage, while the opposite is the case with those who are not in a state of conjugial love.

7. Conjugial love has its seat in chaste wives, but still their love depends on their husbands.

8. Wives love the bonds of marriage, provided that their husbands love them too.

9. The intelligence of women is by nature modest, gracious, peaceable, compliant, soft and gentle, whereas the intelligence of men is by nature critical, rough, resistant, argumentative, and given to intemperance.

10. Wives do not experience a state of arousal as their husbands do, but theirs is a state of readiness to receive.

11. The sexual abundance men have is according to their love of propagating the truths of their wisdom and according to their love of performing useful services.

12. Determinations to intercourse are at the good pleasure of the husband.

13. There is a conjugial atmosphere which flows in from the Lord through heaven into each and every thing of the universe, extending even to its lowest forms.

14. This atmosphere is received by the female sex and communicated through it to the male sex, and not the other way around.

15. Where a truly conjugial love exists, this atmosphere is received by the wife, and by the husband solely through his wife.

16. Where the love is not conjugial, this atmosphere is indeed received by the wife, but not by the husband through her.

17. Truly conjugial love can be present in one of the partners and not at the same time in the other.

18. Married partners bring with them [various similarities and] ¹ various dissimilarities, both internal and external.

19. Various similar qualities can be joined together, but not with dissimilar ones.

20. For people who desire truly conjugial love, the Lord provides a similar partner, and if one is not found on earth, He provides one in heaven.

21. To the degree that a person's conjugial love wanes and is lost, his character approaches that of an animal.

Explanation of these statements now follows.

Footnotes:

316. The second account:

Walking once with tranquil heart in a pleasantly peaceful state of mind, I saw in the distance a wood, which had in the midst of it an enclosed path leading to a little palace; and I saw young women and men and husbands and wives going in. I, too, in the spirit went over there, and I asked one of the keepers standing at the entrance of the path whether I might go in as well. He stared at me; and so I asked, "Why are you staring at me?"

"I am examining you," he replied, "to see whether the pleasant state of peace reflected in your face draws any of its character from a pleasant delight in conjugial love. After this path there is a little garden, and in the middle of it a house with a newly married couple in it. Their friends are coming here today to wish them happiness and joy. I do not know the people I am allowing to enter, but I was told I would recognize them from their faces. If I saw in them a delight in conjugial love, I was to let them in, and no one else."

Every angel can see from others' faces what the delights of their heart are; and because I was thinking about conjugial love, it was a delight in that love that he saw in my face. This contemplation of mine shone from my eyes and lent an inner glow to my face, so that he told me I might go in.

[2] The enclosed path through which I went was lined with fruit trees joined together by interlocking branches, thus forming an unbroken wall of trees on either side. Through this pathway I entered the little garden, which exhaled a pleasant fragrance from its bushes and flowers. The bushes and flowers grew in pairs; and I learned that gardens of this sort appear around houses where weddings are being or have been celebrated, on which account they are called wedding gardens.

After that I went into the house, and there I saw the married couple holding each other by the hand and speaking to each other out of truly conjugial love. Moreover, from their faces I was given to see then an image of conjugial love, and from their conversation, its vibrancy.

Later, when I among many others had expressed my prayers for them and wished them happiness and joy, I went out into the wedding garden; and I saw on the right side of it a group of young men, to which all who left the house went hurrying over. They all hurried over there because they were having a conversation about conjugial love, and this conversation drew the hearts of all with a kind of hidden force to it. I listened then to a wise person in the group speaking about that love, and what I heard was in summary the following:

[3] "The Lord's Divine providence is most specific and therefore most universal in connection with marriages and in its operation in marriages in heaven, because all blessings of heaven flow from the delights of conjugial love, like sweet waters from a sweetly gushing spring. It is therefore provided by the Lord that conjugial pairs be born, and they are raised and continually prepared for their marriages, neither the boy nor the girl being aware of the fact. Then, after a period of time, the girl - now a marriageable young woman - and the boy - now a young man able to marry - meet somewhere, as though by fate, and notice each other. And they immediately recognize, as if by a kind of instinct, that they are a match, thinking to themselves from a kind of inner dictate, the young man, 'she is mine,' and the young woman, 'he is mine.' Later, after this thought has for some time become settled in the minds of each, they deliberately talk about it together and pledge themselves to each other in marriage.

"We say as though by fate and as if by instinct, when we mean by Divine providence, because when one is unaware that it is Divine providence, that is how it appears."

With respect to his statement that conjugial pairs are born, raised and prepared for their marriages without their knowing, the speaker supported it by the conjugial similarity visible in the faces of a couple, also by the innermost and eternal union of their hearts and minds, neither of which would be possible the way they are in heaven unless foreseen and provided by the Lord.

[4] Having said this - to which the group responded with applause - the wise person speaking went on to say that there is a conjugial element in the smallest particulars in every person, both male and female; only that the conjugial element in the male and the conjugial element in the female are not the same, but the conjugial element of the male possesses a capacity for conjunction with the conjugial element of the female, and vice versa, even in the least particulars.

This he showed by the marriage of will and understanding in every individual, the two of which operate together in the least constituents of the mind and in the least constituents of the body; from which it can be seen that there is a conjugial element in each component, even the least. "This is also made evident," he said, "from the composite organs of the body which are formed from its elemental constituents. We find, for example, two eyes, two ears, two nostrils, two cheeks, two lips, two arms and hands, two legs, two feet; and inside the body, two hemispheres of the brain, two ventricles of the heart, two lungs, two kidneys, two testicles. Even when an organ is not paired, still it exhibits a division into two parts. The reason there are these sets of two is that one is connected with the will and the other with the intellect, which operate in conjunction with each other so marvelously that they give the appearance of being one. Thus the two eyes produce one power of sight, the two ears one power of hearing, the two nostrils one sense of smell, the two lips one speech, the two hands one labor, the two feet one gait, the two hemispheres of the brain one habitation of the mind, the two chambers of the heart one life of the body through the blood, the two lungs one respiration, and so on. Only that in the case of a married couple, the masculine element and feminine element united by truly conjugial love produce one life that is fully human."

[5] As he was saying this, a shaft of lightning appeared in the sky to our right having a red color, and another shaft of lightning to our left that was white, neither of them very intense. These entered through our eyes into our minds and illumined them as well. Then, following these, we heard the sound of thunder - in actuality a low murmur coming from the angelic heaven and growing louder in its descent.

Hearing it, and having seen the lightning, the wise person speaking said, "These are meant for me as a signal and admonition to add to my discussion something further, that in the twinned pairs of organs I have mentioned, the one on the right symbolizes the good connected with the two, and the one on the left the truth connected with them; and that this is owing to the marriage of good and truth engraved on each person in his whole being and in his every least part, good having relation to the will and truth to the understanding, and the two together to a union of these. For this reason, in heaven 'the right eye' means the good connected with sight, and 'the left eye' the truth connected with it. So, too, 'the right ear' means the good connected with hearing, and 'the left ear' the truth connected with it. Similarly, 'the right hand' means the good connected with a person's strength, and 'the left hand' the truth connected with it. And so on with the rest of these twinned pairs.

"Moreover, because 'right' and 'left' have these symbolic associations, the Lord said:

If your right eye causes you to slip, pluck it out.... And if your right hand causes you to slip, cut it off.... ¹

"He meant by this that if something good is turned to evil, it should be cast away.

"For the same reason He also told His disciples to cast their net on the right side of the boat, and when they did so, they caught a great number of fish. ² And by this He meant they should teach the good of charity, and by doing so would gather in people."

[6] Following these remarks, the two shafts of lightning appeared again, still less intense than before. And we saw then that the lightning on the left drew the whiteness of its light from the reddish fire of the lightning on the right.

Seeing this, the speaker said, "It is a sign from heaven confirming what I have said, because something fiery in heaven means something good, and something white there means something true. As for our having seen that the lightning on the left drew the whiteness of its light from the reddish fire of the lightning on the right, this is visible evidence that the whiteness of light or light itself is nothing other than the luminance of fire."

At the end of this discourse, all in the group were fired with a joyful state of goodness and truth inspired by the shafts of lightning and what they had been told concerning them, and in this state they departed for home.

Footnotes: